(no subject)

[tacticianing]

WHO: Kidou, whoever else
WHERE: Anywhere
WHEN: This month
WHAT: Open belated log
WARNINGS: Not unless being needlessly dramatic counts

The tire
Heropa, dated to when Endou left/before swear-in

[To look around the park close to the ImPort government housing, there’s barely any signs of winter at all; some trees lost their leaves, others seem convinced it’s fall, still others never got the memo and insist on displaying green leaves in blatant defiance of seasonal change. Those out and about tend to prefer tshirts and jeans; there’s no sign of scarves, and only a few have jackets or sweaters.

All this makes the diminutive red-cloaked figure on the hill stand out all the more.

It’s a fantastic spot, rising just high enough to look out over the treetops to the housing beyond. Someone, a long time ago, planted an oak tree here. Someone else, far more recently, affixed a tire to one of its branches with rope. Next to this stands Kidou, completely still save for his cloak fluttering in the occasional breeze.

He’s been here since a little after school let out, once he confirmed that Endou wasn’t coming back. He’ll be here for a good while more, at least if he’s left to his own devices.]

Location scouting
Any city but Maurtia Falls, between feb 6-10, late afternoons

[Kidou’s got one single mission in mind. When he’s not at soccer practice or school, he’s out exploring, looking for lesser populated areas that don’t immediately scream ‘dangerous area, keep away’. You might see him wandering the street, poking his head into the occasional alley, walking down trails through parks. At one point he explores some of Heropa’s beach, keeping an eye out towards the land to check for visibility.

But mostly you’ll see him walking around abandoned lots, unused stretches of forest inbetween housing and roads, standing at the edge of ditches; anywhere that looks like people won’t immediately see. He doesn't stray too far from the Porter in any city - accessibility is important.

Of course, a middle schooler heading deliberately out into lesser traveled or forgotten areas might look a little bit suspicious. Especially the way he stops and looks around now and then, surveying the area before moving on again.]


Intense Soccer Pong, Nonah or Maurtia Falls, either after school or on a weekend.

[There aren’t training facilities like he’s used to anymore around here, but that’s no excuse to let his own skills rust; it just means he's been creative about his methods. Today’s individual practice is going to consist of beating up one specifically chosen spot of concrete wall with a soccer ball until he either misses or a half hour passes, whichever comes first.

Until then, his additional (ridiculous) challenge for himself today is this ball is never going to hit the ground. He can't waste any time that way; every motion has to be precise and exactly controlled.

He’s picked a spot to the side of an abandoned gas station, where there’s a decent amount of space to run, and a wide stretch of wall to tackle. The abandoned property has not gone unnoticed to local gangs, who have taken it upon themselves to gleefully redecorate the walls with vaguely legible scribbles and random symbols.

Kidou’s picked a spot directly in the middle of a wide loop at the end of one of those messages, and has set one goal; no matter what, hit the exact same spot. Just like all the other times, the ball hits inside the graffiti right on target, rebounding at a slight angle away from him.

He’s ready for it. As soon as Kidou’s sent the ball back, he’s rapidly calculating where it will be in a second. By the time it bounces, Kidou’s already running, and doesn’t stop as much as plant one foot firmly on the ground to let his momentum swing his body around. It conserves energy while powering his return kick, sending the ball towards the wall at a wider rebound angle.

It's almost too wide. He just barely makes it to catch the ball again this time, and then he’s running off in the opposite direction all over again, angling for a better angle this kick. And so this goes on - interrupt him? Join in? Wait until he finally is forced to call it quits and retrieves a water bottle he’d stashed against the building?]


Wildcard
[Got something else? Go for it or hit me up at crobatman to request a starter.]

Comments

Intense Soccer Pong

[unbreaker]

[In the weeks following the restoration of power to the Porter cities, Josuke had gone back to living his life as normally as possible. Now and then the peace in Heropa was interrupted by criminals still at large and he would do what he could to see them arrested, but mostly his days were quiet and filled with the routine attending police academy demanded.

It wasn't an ideal lifestyle, absent of the freedoms he'd grown accustomed to in Morioh and even here when he'd first arrived, but he wasn't without opportunities to shake things up a little, either. Usually, those came in the way of meeting new people and making new friends...

...one of which Josuke hadn't heard from or seen since the blackout.

He and Kidou weren't close, but after what they'd gone through he'd hoped to at least hear from the kid once, even if it was just to say that he was alright—but there was nothing. Radio silence. And Josuke didn't know the younger boy's friends to be able to ask them to pass along a message, so he did the next best thing one day during the week after classes had ended and school had let out. He went to visit Kidou where they had met: Nonah Middle School.

Unfortunately, his timing must have been off, for none of the students who passed him in the yard even resembled the very distinguishable middle schooler who'd helped him take care of two despicable criminals. There was no one sporting those curious goggles, tied dreadlocks, or very unusual cape...

After what seemed like half an hour had passed, he decided to give up. He could come back another day, but at least while he was there in Nonah he could pay Player Select a visit—an excursion that didn't last too long. With many of the students out of school for the day, most of the machines were occupied and the look on Vanessa's face told Josuke today wasn't a day to press his luck. He played a little NBA, a few games on one of the racers, and after attempting (and failing) to tackle another zombie shooter, he called it quits and left.

The sun was near to setting by then, and Josuke's stomach was running on empty. The nearest and cheapest stop he knew of was a gas station just a couple blocks over. Josuke expected to find himself a nice hot coffee there and maybe a snack to tide him over until he got home but what he found instead was that the place had shut down since his last visit and was abandoned but for—Kidou.

He watches for a few minutes as the smaller boy launches an all out assault on the wall of the building, the soccer ball he has control of never once touching the ground before he's sending it back again towards the painted bricks. If he was holding a drink already, he might have dropped it.]

Whoa! You're really good.

[tacticianing]

[If he could see himself, he might say he was tackling a challenge that was a bit punitively difficult after what, to him, counted as an off season. But he can't - his whole focus is narrowed only on where the ball is about to be, and therefore where he should be. How many seconds it takes to extend a kick. He's testing for excess in his form - no matter how good his reaction time, it could always be better.

He's concentrating hard enough on this exercise, he doesn't appear to be aware he's got a spectator until Josuke speaks up. The next time he reclaims the ball, he runs just a little bit farther, hitting it into the air on one knee and trapping it deftly under his foot as it falls back to the ground. If it wasn't quite as cold out as it is, he'd be close to sweating.

Kidou doesn't acknowledge the compliment verbally, but it's difficult to miss the extremely pleased smirk in reaction, especially when he looks over to the man. Yeah, he is good. ...It's nice to hear it.]

Good to see you.

[He's a bit sorry to cut his wall time short, but it's both hard and rude to try conversing while doing that. He can always go back to it later.]

[unbreaker]

You too!

[Kidou looks well enough, where much of Josuke's own injuries from the blackout are still fading. Of course, you wouldn't know it for the way he carries himself, tall and proud, and clearly happy Kidou hasn't forgotten him. Happier still to see that pleased smirk. The circumstances before hadn't allowed for much smiling, so it's nice to know that the kid's feathers weren't too ruffled by what happened...and what they'd kept from happening.]

Actually, I was hoping I'd run into you. Went looking at that school of yours but we must have just missed each other.

[Honestly, he needs to learn to plan meetings with people better. He's too used to friends with reliable schedules and people he can just drop in on. That sort of predictability doesn't come with most people you meet for the first time.]

How've you been?

[tacticianing]

[Kidou sure seemed fine. Mostly, it had been enough time between the incident and now for him to distance from it and snap his defenses back into place. You couldn't tell at all that anything had happened not that long ago, looking at his reactions now. Sure, he brushes off the question, but that's nothing unusual for him.]

Well enough.

[Kidou slides his foot under the ball and kicks it up, deftly maneuvering it safely underneath one arm. If he's being specifically sought out, there's a reason for it. Individual practice is probably over for today, but maybe there's something else interesting - or important - to take its place.

Plus, maybe they had not met under the best of circumstances, but Kidou appreciates what he's learned about this guy thus far. It really is good to see he's alright after that, and to get a chance to find out more about him. They've fought together as allies, and that goes a long way with Kidou.]

What's up?

[unbreaker]

[Generally speaking, there are three things Crazy Diamond can't fix: anything with parts that no longer exist, Josuke's own injuries, and lives that have been lost.

But there's a fourth thing, a sort of unspoken rule that often frustrates Josuke even though he understands why things are the way that they are—and even that they're better this way.

He cannot mend broken hearts or other emotional wounds and scars. Which is why, when faced with those he knows or has reason to suspect might not be quite as well off as they would have others believe, he offers what he hopes is the next best thing: his unwavering friendship and support. And inexhaustible levels of hope and patience.]

Oh, you know...figured I should check in.

[Because that's what friends do when they haven't heard from each other, right? And Josuke at least regards Kidou as a friend now. That may or may not go both ways, but even if it doesn't, Josuke's opinion of Kidou is shining. He'd had the kid's back during the encounter at Nonah Middle School, but Kidou had really come through for him, too. And Josuke wasn't about to forget that. Not ever.]

I mean, might be nice to get a chance to talk on slightly better terms, yeah?

[tacticianing]

I have no problem with that.

[Apparently, that's Kidou for 'sure, let's hang out'. A true genius at social interaction, this one. Fortunately, his expression says more than his incredibly neutral acceptance of the idea. It wasn't through soccer, but he has the idea that he's seen through to this man's heart anyway. Anyone who stood up to evil like that... he couldn't imagine a downside to hanging out with that same guy that had fought alongside him to save the life of a helpless person. That is the kind of person Kidou would want to know.

In hindsight, it had been striking just how quickly Kidou had been accepted as a potential ally. He hadn't thought much of it at the time. There were more pressing concerns to worry about than his own safety.

Was this guy the same? He had a feeling, maybe so.

Yeah. Definitely. They should hang out. Kidou glances to the side of the building where he's stashed his school bag and a water bottle, visibly considering grabbing them in preparation for relocation.]

You have somewhere in mind? I can't imagine this is an ideal spot for such things.

[unbreaker]

Yeah, I ah...haven't been out this way in a bit. I didn't know this place shut down.

[Though he's almost glad he didn't know, because it meant having the good fortune to run into exactly who he'd been looking for earlier.]

I think there's a malt shoppe nearby? [It wasn't as cheap as the gas station had been, but what it served was considerably more filling. And you couldn't go wrong with burgers, fries, and ice cream, right?] Need help carrying anything? I got two free hands.

The Tire

[beastfang]

[The park was at a directional center that cuts time out of various routes he had mapped his first few days here. Thus it had become habitual that at least once or twice a day had him walking or jogging through said park. It was why he had been in said area on his way to the porter with a bag slung over his shoulder and communicator in hand.

Considering that he hadn't seen a reason to ask yet, he was unaware of just where exactly Kidou lived or even worked. Thus by being at the porter if Kidou did wish to see the first two transcribed months of relevant network posts then it was more efficient to be already at the porter when a location was given. Even if said location was in Heropa, if it wasn't in walking distance there were several bus stops near the porter that were. Those plans were put to the side when he notices a familiar figure on that curious hill he's passed so many times before. He'd only given the tree with it's tire a brief glance in the past. (Likely child begged a parent to make a tire swing for them at some point and it was just never taken down.) However, for Kidou to be there and seemingly planning to remain there for a length of time was odd.

Course changed, communicator placed back into his bag, and his stride slowed to the typical walking pattern he would use around Teikoku gives enough time and warning for the other to realize he's there before he makes it to the top of the hill. He doesn't say anything when he stops a short distance away from Kidou. He had already announced his presence, so he would wait for the other to acknowledge or tell him to leave.]

[tacticianing]

[As Genda climbs up to join him, Kidou never glances in his direction. His head stays pointed directly forward, standing as tall as his short stature allows. Even when Genda comes to a stop, Kidou doesn't have to look to know who it is. He'd know the footsteps of anyone in Teikoku anywhere. Their patterns and cadences became second nature to him, giving him an almost supernatural kind of awareness when it came to where his old team would be. He could recognize any of them, anywhere, and it seemed that wasn't going to change no matter how much time had passed.

For most people, he'd likely let the silence stretch forever, glad for the silent company but not ready to risk talking yet. Even with Genda, it's tempting to do that; it's what they would have done back in Teikoku. If Gran hadn't given him a not so subtle reminder, maybe he would have.

But Kidou is Raimon now, and being away from Raimon for months was no excuse to not act it.

It's a good half minute before he finally turns towards both the tire and his teammate, looking to Genda, then back to Endou's tire. His voice isn't any softer than it usually is, but it doesn't have any of its usual firmness to it now.]

Do you know what this is?

[beastfang]

[The question seems random and with a simple answer to those that know Kidou never asked such types of questions of anyone. He had never been acquainted with Endou's odd form of training or the significance of just why this particular tire had brought Kidou here. So he has no idea outside of the typical answer most would give.

Even though the other isn't actually looking at him Genda still shifts his stance, more open and the slight down and to the left tilt of his head, the silent cues he normally gave when he was willing to listen or be told something the other was mulling over. Normally it would be Sakuma he would ask such of, since he was far more likely to use Genda as a silent sounding bored when some problem needed to be worked out verbally instead of mentally.]

Not the significance.


[And that answer pretty much gives both an out and a lead in, depending on if this really was something Kidou wished to tell him.]

[tacticianing]

No, you wouldn't.

[With that completely necessary agreement, Kidou takes a step forward, letting his hand lightly rest against the rough rubber. The last time he touched this was when Endou enlisted his help to untangle him from the thing; apparently Endou had seen fit to try to mix festive decorations and hard training for reasons Kidou was never going to understand. Now that Kidou's close enough, he can see there's still a few broken strands of tinsel caught in the grooves.

It doesn't really surprise him that he's still finding more. They'd done their best to collect it, but the stuff was elusive. But instead of collecting it like they'd been, he'll let it stay there, giving his friend one more tiny mark on a world he didn't belong in.

It's harsh, being confronted with the realization that he probably wouldn't be needing to solve that kind of problem again. Sure, it was stupid, but... it was the ultimately harmless kind that Kidou had grown used to.]

This tire is for goalkeeper training. The idea is to push it forcefully, and stop it when it comes back. Endou set it up here for that purpose.

[beastfang]

[It's the mention of Endou more then anything else that focuses him even more on both Kidou's words and body language. If this was set up by Endou then he likely would have been here at some point for Genda to run across, even in this short amount of time. If not hunted down by the more enthusiastic goalkeeper, because he was not a person that would have bypassed someone else to play soccer with. Especially in this world where soccer was so lifeless. Yet aside from one brief mention of him there hadn't been any indication until this moment he had been here for Genda to find.

That was worrying, it was hard to not notice how easily Endou could bond with someone by playing with or against them in soccer, and Kidou was no exception. So much of their new paths had been because of that pull Endou had on Kidou, even from that first match they ever played against him. To see this tire and know who had set it up, and the fact Kidou was here alone...

It was either recent or this was the mark of a certain amount of time passing from when it happened.

Either way, likely none of those who had been here with Kidou for a length of time must realize where or why he's here, if he's been allowed to be here with just his thoughts. Gran nor Amada seem the type to have allowed this without one being nearby at the least if things got too far in Kidou overthinking things.


He moves to where there's only three hand spans between them, anyone else would think he was moving forward to examine the tire. Instead once he's close enough that he infringes on Kidou's space bubble, but doesn't actually bypass it he turns away. Back to back and still silent even as he moderates his breathing into slow, steady, and deep breaths that are exactly two seconds between each inhale and exhale. It was a move he used when someone was upset but may still need the illusion of not being seen. He would only have the tone of voice to go by like this if the other needed to talk, and it was easy to pretend any variations that indicated the other wasn't fine never happened. He had done this with several others in Teikoku, but he's never done so with Kidou before. He had never thought there would be such reason.]

[tacticianing]

[When Gran told him specifically to show Genda what Endou had shown him, he probably hadn't meant it quite this literally. It's just how this ends up playing out. Between that advice and the heavy symbolism wrapping it all together... well. Maybe this was just how things were going to go.

It feels like Genda's moving closer. With Genda mostly at his back, Kidou can't tell, and the narrow range his goggles allow would remove any chance at confirming it. It means Kidou isn't sure if that's right, but once a soft crunch of leaves behind him reveals that he's not imagining this, he simply lets it happen. If that's what Genda chooses, he can do whatever he's going to do. Kidou doesn't have it in him to analyze anything right now.

Although he's close, Genda's presence isn't all that notable once he's holding still. It's just enough to provide companionship, without the overwhelming quality most people had right now.

Seconds pass. Kidou's head tilts downwards more, eyes not really focusing as much as staring blankly ahead of him. His breathing gradually finds a slower rhythm. There's still a silence between them, but this time the painful feeling accompanying it has nothing to do with either of them. More time passes, but Kidou's not keeping track of it. It could be a minute, it could be five. It's just the amount of time it takes for Kidou to start warring with himself all over again - should he speak up? Can he speak up? Would it even matter if he did? Nothing can be changed or done.

The seconds pile up until they almost have a physical weight to them. Eventually, he finds his voice again by sheer virtue of feeling like he risks being crushed under them if he doesn't.

He's frustrated at himself by that weakness. Kidou made it a point to stand strong whenever possible, facing any challenge and enduring it. His team should never see him lose control like this. It helped him lead or guide through anything, just as it held him back from being able to voice things when he wanted to.

But right now, it can't be helped. Once he'd mentioned the tire at all, staying silent afterwards is like holding back a flood. The words will inevitably come, just as abrupt as before.]

I was conflicted when Endou arrived here. So far, we have been fortunate, but-

[Kidou hesitates, pausing just long enough to deconstruct and reconstruct that sentence. Some things must never be hinted at, even after they're proven impossible.]

I should be relieved he won’t experience whatever comes next.

[By now, he must have repeated variations on that sentiment to himself a hundred times by now. It's undeniably a good thing Endou's gone. If only emotion obeyed logic.

Alongside his permanent worry about those who are here, he can't help missing those who aren't. He's been permanently caught inbetween that endless loop of wanting people close and needing to shove them out, both for the same underlying reason.]

[beastfang]

He's your teammate.


[It's simply stated, but it holds every answer Genda has figured out just from what he's said. Shin Teikoku had shown them just how far Kidou would go and they had not been actively on the same team at the time. To have one of Raimon here and then for them to be gone, despite how ill equipped said member of Raimon likely was in regards to how this world worked.

It was better for Endou to not be here, but Endou was meant to watch Kidou's back as his goalkeeper. It was two right feelings but which was supposed to be more important?

He doesn't say anymore as anything else would either be empty platitudes or attempts of sympathizing for a situation he's never had to deal with. Instead he shifts on foot barely half a step back that his position is barely any closer visibly, but it's enough to make the awareness of him being there more tangible then it was before.]

location scouting

[resipiscent]

[Yes, it does look suspicious. It looks suspicious enough that Riku takes note of it -- imPorts do weird things, sure, but this is a particularly weird thing. Perhaps it's the kid's age. More likely, it's a combination of factors. But no matter the cause, Riku finds himself nosy, and when Riku gets nosy he can't help but want to find out about whatever the object of his curiosity is.

He only noticed at first because Kidou went past him twice. Riku himself is just working at picking up parcels, a bag of cardboard boxes slung across one shoulder. He can deliver them via portal, but he has to collect them like normal. So when he sees the boy with the goggles pass him a second time, this time equally as intent at whatever he's doing, but in a completely different city, he can't help but want to know what's up.

So Riku does the natural thing and falls into step beside him on the sidewalk. He probably comes off as an intimidating figure to some, but somehow he feels like this particular kid won't be fazed at all.]

You look like you're working hard.

[tacticianing]

[There's a line between being too obvious and being too conspicuously hidden. For years, Kidou had made it part of his life mission to stay just between the two, trying hard to not draw attention. Of course, his appearance alone does that for him, and even when he's not having to specifically hide from anyone, and therefore doesn't have to stick to the corners of buildings or behind telephone poles, he risks being too noticeable.

Kidou doesn't consciously register this fact. He's too busy trying to factor down potential places. It needed to not be too far from the Porter in order to be widely accessible. It needed to be somewhere hopefully sizeable enough to give them range. It needed-

He's only aware that he's got a tail a few seconds before a voice speaks up. A familiar chill of being caught races through him, already preparing him to jump into action if need be (which he literally never has, but it's hard to tell reflexes to not bother.) Kidou pauses, then mentally kicks himself. If that wasn't talking to him, he's indicated that he's listening. If it was, he's indicated that he recognizes that, and therefore confirms the assertion. He wasn't doing anything, especially not yet in this city - he just got here about eight minutes ago. So he can't have really been caught. Right?

Again, it's hard to reason with reflex. Kidou forces himself to not look behind him, laying out his options in rapid analysis. He's already standing still, so moving again isn't an option just yet. He can either move, or wait and see what happens. If he waits, he won't appear to have any reason to wait but he'll confirm if that was aimed at him or not. And by standing here analyzing his options, he's already made his choice, like it or not. Wait and see it is, while forcing himself to look completely calm, like he's not up to something.

Of course, that translates to 'stand tall and look official'. At least an effort is made.]

[resipiscent]

[The boy freezes and Riku can't help but watch him react. Even without being able to make eye contact, he can still see the gears in his brain moving at lightspeed -- who is this person, what do they want, how much do they know. He moves forward slightly so they can make eye contact, lifts both hands, palms out, then drops them.]

Sorry.

[Imposing based on his height, perhaps, but the little bat wings peeking out from behind him don't lend much in the way of ferocity.]

I just -- you've walked past me twice now. I do deliveries in the Porter cities, and I just saw you about half an hour ago in Nonah.

[Now it's Heropa, though, which was why he actually paid attention.]

You're looking for something?

[tacticianing]

[Kidou recovers fairly quickly. His muscles don't completely relax, but he's not visibly tensing anymore. So, this guy noticed... huh?

That's interesting. Bad for him, undeniably - he hadn't noticed that at all. Was he really losing his edge that much? Kidou prided himself on his observational skills, although he tended to have a laser focus on what was before him. To miss someone who noticed him like that was unsettling, especially with what he'd been cautioned about when it came to the natives in this world.

This guy - he's an ImPort, no doubt about it. Kidou should have noticed. But instead of sharing any of these thoughts with the class, he gives about as noncommittal an answer as he possibly can. Not a yes, not a no. A complete non-answer, in a completely toneless voice.]

Not particularly.

[Yeah, that's believable...]

[resipiscent]

["Not particularly." Not particularly convincing, more like. Riku raises his eyebrows, but doesn't say anything to that right away. It reminds him of himself, actually -- of forcing an expression off his face, staying neutral. Give Maleficent nothing. It's this realization that keeps him from just shrugging and taking off. Instead, he nods, then crosses in front of Kidou to park himself on the windowsill of the office building they're standing next to.]

You're not new, I've seen you around at swear-ins. But for someone who isn't new, you're looking at things as if you are.

[A pause.]

Sorry. I guess, technically, it's not my business. I'm just curious.

[tacticianing]

[This guy isn't wrong. Kidou's been here for half a year now. He's not surprised that's a known fact, either; the spotlight has always been on him in one way or another. This world has an irritating habit of shining it where it doesn't belong and hasn't been earned, unlike his own.

He's been so careful to do nothing. Well... nothing that anyone would take note of. But it doesn't matter, and never would.

Since it seems like he's going to be stopped here for a while, Kidou's hands appear briefly from beneath his cloak, only to tuck themselves away against tightly folded arms. All too casually, his head turns to follow the guy, making no secret of the fact he's keeping him inside of his narrow field of vision.

He's not usually one to opt for excuses. It's easier to just never offer one. But perhaps it wouldn't hurt to further a false impression, since the alternative could be being followed again by someone who's apparently far better at staying in the background than Kidou would like. This could be a problem if he stays that curious. (Not much of one, which he'd have to acknowledge if he could stop being a melodramatic weirdo.)]

Is there a time limit for sightseeing?

tire

[alreadyhuman]

[ Vivi likes to climb and explore; he's been here a few times before. He'd wondered a little about the tire, when he'd climbed the hill the first time, but he didn't really worry too much about it.

Today there's someone here, and he announces his presence much more clearly with a vigorous wave as he comes up the hill. When he gets close enough to recognise the person standing there, he pumps his legs to get up the hill a bit faster so he can join Kidou there, standing next to him in momentary silence. ]

...

Everything looks really nice from up here...do you think so too?

[ He's...trying to make conversation. He's not sure what's wrong, but he feels like something is. Or maybe Kidou just likes being here? He doesn't know for sure. ]

[tacticianing]

[It's not that he's ignoring Vivi, but that he's not reacting to either the wave or realizing the small figure was hurrying up the hill to join him. Only when asked a direct question does Kidou cut his statue impression just enough to answer. Even if he doesn't look over to his new companion.]

Yeah.

[Most times, Kidou's soft voice has a clipped, controlled quality to it. It's mostly notable when that quality isn't there anymore, and his voice betrays a sadness that he's trying so hard to prevent his expression from showing.]

No matter how much things may change, this place doesn't seem to.

[alreadyhuman]

[ Vivi can pick up on people's emotions easily; it's something he unconsciously learned, and later put effort into - wanting to learn, wanting to understand people and connect with them.

The sadness sticks out. ]

It's nice to have things that don't change. [ His voice is wistful. ] Everyone says that changing is good, but they never talk about how it hurts a lot. And sometimes it's not even good at all.

If you could pick what you wanted to change...that'd be the best thing, I think.

[tacticianing]

Maybe...

[Vivi gets a small smile for that. What can be done about most of the things that happen? Such idealism has largely been driven out of Kidou; wishful thinking never got him what he wanted, sometimes no matter how hard he fought for it or how much he endured for it.

It's strange to think about being able to choose anything about what changes, at this point. Change is something that often can't be helped, just dealt with.]

If everyone got that same choice, would anything happen?

[That's a lot closer to how life is, in general - but it doesn't count for selections canceling each other out. Or maybe he's taking this thought exercise as an excuse to avoid thinking about one change in particular. Probably that.]

[alreadyhuman]

[ There's things you can't change, things you can never change. Vivi wants to change many, many things about the world, and some of them are about himself.

He knows that it's not possible.

But just because it's not possible doesn't mean he doesn't want it. ]

If enough people wanted it, then maybe...I don't really know, though. It's kind of hard to tell...so many people want different things.

[ He fidgets with his staff, the smoothed surface a comforting thing to concentrate on as he tries to think of what to say next. ]

But if everyone, even bad people, got to choose everything they wanted, maybe it wouldn't work so well. So maybe that's not good after all.