la cucaracha! la cucaracha! [closed]

[subourbon]

WHO: Clone Club + "friends"
WHERE: Mexico!
WHEN: Feb 17 onwards
WHAT: Clone Club's first family vacation across the border! They're probably all going to fight over the bathroom, tbh
WARNINGS: N/A

Comments

[subourbon]

[Because she's Alison Hendrix, that's how.]

Well, I just need to get a purse with a zipper on it, and we can head out.

[doubleblind]

I'll meet you right outside.

[Cosima's pretty sure she does not want to witness Alison's paranoid preparation for their adventure in the city. She'll wait outside to keep her own sanity.]

[subourbon]

[Fifteen minutes later, Alison strolls out front looking askance at everyone who walks by. She clutches at her purse and mutters under her breath like a crazy person.]

Okay, well, I'm set!

[doubleblind]

Thank god.

[Cosima looks more than a little exasperated when Alison finally makes her way outside.]

I mean, me too. Let's go.

[subourbon]

Do you know where we're going?

[Because Alison has serious concerns about Cosima's map-reading skills.]

[doubleblind]

Yeah.

[Cosima pauses to unfurl her map, which is dotted with a dozens of locations marked. There seem to be vague travel routes traced on it, but some of them don't seem to follow roads.]

Ish.

[subourbon]

Oh for Pete's sake, give me that!

[Sometimes Alison is mystified at how her clone has managed to survive to adulthood, genius or no. Taking out her own pen from her purse, she makes quick corrections to their routes and then even goes to confirm with the bellboy that it should get them where they want to go.]

[doubleblind]

[Cosima willingly gives up the map. She'll let Alison play navigator as long as Cosima still gets to choose their stops. She interrupts Alison's conversation with the bellboy.]

So, if we wanted to make a couple museum stops, what would you suggest?

[subourbon]

What do you mean "a couple"?

[Alison is decidedly not interested in a whole afternoon of museums, thank you very much.]

[doubleblind]

It's good to have options, right?

[Cosima fixes Alison with her cutest puppy dog eye look. This will totally work, right?]

[subourbon]

If I go to these museums with you, I want you to start picking up after yourself in the apartment.

[There is no way Alison is going along with this without getting something out of it.]

[doubleblind]

Deal.

[How well she'll clean is a totally different story.]

[subourbon]

And if I see anything lying out where it shouldn't be, I'll just throw it out.

[doubleblind]

Whoa, whoa, isn't that a little extreme?

[subourbon]

No.

[doubleblind]

[Cosima sighs with the most exaggerated hand gesture paired with it. She has a feeling she's going to regret making this deal.]

How do we share the same genes?

[subourbon]

I ask myself the same question all the time.

[But her tone at least sounds more amused than not.]

[doubleblind]

[Cosima drapes one arm over Alison's shoulders, moving them toward the door.]

Awww, see. If we're asking the same question, we can't be that different.

[subourbon]

[She tolerates the arm-draping for about sixty seconds before she shrugs it off.]

Don't even joke. My mother barely believed we were related in any way.

[doubleblind]

[Sixty seconds is a small victory in Cosima's mind!]

Okay, to be fair, you did kind of spring it on her in the worst possible way.

[subourbon]

Well, I thought my mother was due for a reality-check. Not that I made so much as a dent in her armor of complete denial.

[That's made two people she's told about being a clone at point-blank who didn't believe her.]

[doubleblind]

[Alison is clearly telling the wrong people. Cosima's track record with people believing her is much better.]

I'm still not entirely sure who she thinks I am if not your genetic identical...

[subourbon]

She thinks her supposedly "exclusive sperm sample" was sold off to some other woman, basically.

[doubleblind]

Oh my god...

[Cosima keeps it together for approximately ten seconds before cracking up.]

[subourbon]

[Alison just looks exasperated.]

Do you see what I was growing up with?