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WHO: Everyone!
WHERE: An hour outside De Chima
WHEN: January 10-12
WHAT: imPorts are treated to a Swear-In that’s nothing but a weekend of relaxation at a brand new resort and spa!
WARNINGS: Possible mild nudity

It’s been a long few months, hasn’t it imPorts? Between the invading monsters (yikes!), evading the apocalypse (double yikes!) and then some fear toxin on behalf of your good pal Joker (triple yikes!), imPorts are overdue for a vacation. And wouldn’t you know it? One is coming right up.

Oh, yeah. It’s a Hot Springs Episode.

Welcome to Elysium Resort and Spa! When you come in, you’ll get a brochure with all of their offerings. They’re a little confused, perhaps, espousing relaxation ideals of every culture, clearly having just thrown all of their relaxation spaghetti at the wall to see if it sticks, but they’ve got the spirit! The smell of eucalyptus fills the air as you toe off your shoes and change into the slippers and robes that they have available for you as they usher you into what must be, for some, absolute paradise.

You can find rooms for all persuasions here, all purporting various health benefits. They have your typical fare - salt rooms, saunas, steam rooms, buckets of water with ladles resting in them to pour over the heaters to allow them to sizzle - but be warned! Some of these rooms climb up to ridiculous temperatures, leaving the bottoms of your feet red and toasty as you jump in (they suggest sandals, but who reads instructions anyway?), and other rooms are filled with ice as you’re plunged into what may as well be a walk-in freezer. Sometimes the doors are a little fiddly, though. Don’t worry - you won’t get trapped in here long enough for any real harm to come to you. But you might get a little uncomfortable as you rattle at the door, one of the employees eventually hurrying to let you out and offering their sincerest apologies, and won’t you have a gift certificate?

If those rooms aren’t enough for you, you can check out the baths. Salt baths, chilled baths, and hot tubs galore are here for imPorts, but that’s not all. Ever wanted to bathe in tea? In wine? Would you like to sink into a bath filled entirely with clay? How about getting all your dead skin chomped off by fish? It’s all here for you! Just try not to drink the bathwater - or, heavens, eat the fish. Those aren’t for you!

As imPorts stroll outside, they’ll see a beautiful vista overlooking the mountains, attached to a spacious hot springs (it’s natural, they claim, but who’s checking?) where imPorts can simply relax and enjoy the scenery. After that, why not pop inside to where some of the technicians will absolutely insist that you get a massage. Or a mani-pedi - yes, even you, big guy. Or, really, anything that your heart desires.

Once you’ve been poked and prodded and primped to your heart’s content (or discontent, as it may be), the spa open until the wee hours of the morning, it’s time to go and dine on some of the local cuisine, prepared fresh by the resort’s resident chef with a distinct eye to fresh, clean flavors and a truly ridiculous amount of salad. They want to make sure that you’re healthy inside and out, after all!

Before arriving at the spa, everyone was able to choose who they wanted to room with. But it seems that their systems got a bit scrambled during their grand opening, so you may find yourself bunking with a stranger instead. They’re deeply apologetic, of course, but it really would be easier for them if you’d just be nice for an evening and give it a shot. It’s only one evening, right? It’s not like you’ll be roomed with a serial killer. Probably. Given the imPort population there’s, what, a five percent chance?

The hotel rooms themselves are beautiful and spacious, each with a window looking out over the lovely view of the scenery below. It’s the perfect way to end your night… until 3 AM when an alarm begins to blare and all of the guests are ushered outside in the chilly winter air while firefighters come to check the place out. It’s a false alarm (some brat must have pulled it, the manager says apologetically, ready with more gift certificates), but hey, maybe this is a good chance to get to know your neighbors!

The next day, guests are free to take advantage of the resort’s facilities once more, or they can go hiking in the mountainous trails available to them, complete with regular rest stops with firepits, with the staff more than happy to pack lunchboxes and fixings for s’mores.

After they come back and have a thankfully uneventful night’s rest, buses will be ready to take them back to civilization, along with goodie bags filled with luxury goods and an earnest invitation to come back anytime! But maybe next time, wait a couple of months so they can iron out the kinks in their system.

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No, and that's what makes it so exciting.

[Of course, M knows the odds. He always knows the odds. And that includes the odds of how amusing it is to explicitly not telling Kylo the odds of a snake or an ogre named Snake coming into the room.

Instead, he starts to disrobe, fully taking the attendant up on the offer to get more comfortable.]

We could take a whole week. Just you and I. [Hiking and camping outdoors. He is used to camping for Garrison exercises but camping for fun? It sounds amazing.]

If we pick a really good spot, we could take two weeks. [He takes a left and tugs Keith along with him. He flashes a bright smile. If only he had both his arms again.]

There’s a lot of things we can see and do. We could take one vacation a year.

Were you lab grown or messed with later as an adult? [A perfectly normal question.]

Oh. Okay. Don't do that.

[he'd rather not see that, thanks.

...something occurs to him. it's a really stupid idea, but that's never stopped archie before.]

...Wanna fight?

He says nothing; Sharpedo jumps up out the water and pushes him under. These awful weirdos. Friggin' team leaders, man. Archie resurfaces after a minute or so, gagging.

"Ugh, I think there's a solid layer of pubes an' skin down there. Augh!" Cough, cough, hack. Nasty.

...

Archie edges closer to Pikachu.

"Now, you ain't about to get some static worked up in that thing, are ya?"

[Shiro blinks and stares at him.] You want to spar while I’m like this?

[A spar wouldn’t be bad but he always prefers to his human body for that. He stretches his wings and paddles a little harder to stay afloat.] I’m not opposed just, might be a good idea to set some rules.

"Oh, that's for sure. Very similar. We had an American tourist visit Dog River once. Well, he got lost, ended up in Dog River by mistake and the town decided to count that as a tourist." Because no one ever visited Dog River for the excitement of watching a pile of wood. "He knew more about Canada than most of us, and he didn't expect any of us to say a-boot or eh. He really fit into the town better than I did, since he was used to small towns and I'm from Toronto originally."

"I like a lot of things about this world. The powers are fun, being able to travel by porter is good too. The only thing I don't like is that I miss my friends from home."

Not just me. You'd kill me!

[he nods to sharpedo, who splashes excitedly.]

Reckon me an' Sharpedo could give ya a run for your money.

[ Even a little bit of distance between them feels like the greatest of gifts. With Kirk's grip momentarily off of him, Joker sucks in a deep, greedy breath, grateful for the precious few seconds he's just bought himself.

His gaze darts first to Kirk's belly to confirm the damage—and look, the bastard does bleed!—then to the hotel room door. The door is only a dozen or so feet away, and on the other side is help and hope and life. But he's already seen how fast this Fake Bat can move. Twelve feet or a hundred, it doesn't matter: Joker knows he'll never make it.

On an upnote, at least he can talk now. That'll have to be enough.

He looks at the awful grin Kirk is giving him, and frantically tries to think of what he can say that might de-escalate this to something a little less lethal. ]

Scare you? No.

No, no. [ He can feel soda all over him, sticky and sweet. Still holding the broken bottle, Joker raises his hands in surrender. If there's any Batman in this creature, perhaps that will help get through to it. ] I just wanted the chance to explain.

[ He thinks of his meeting with Carol, and her faith that there was still something salvageable in him. God, he wishes she was here right now. ]

I want to change. [ He shoves as much sincerity into it as he possibly can, his eyes pleading with Kirk: Believe me, please, believe me. ] Carol Danvers, she's been helping me; you can ask her...

Yes.

[Because fuck if he knows. He thinks he had a life before, but he can't be certain.]

[That does sound alright to her. Not bad, nothing to be ashamed of, though she doesn't really get it all the same. Etheria doesn't have models.]

Me? I was a soldier. Now I'm...it's really complicated...but basically a super soldier? And a princess.

Shitty. They didn't get me until I was five. I'm still pissed I didn't get the healing factor.

[He shifts from side to side in the water and studies Sharpedo. His lightning breath would be too dangerous for a spar.] Okay.

But we’re in a lake. I won’t use my lightning breath.

[He spreads his wings and the light grey feathers catch the light. On any agreement he flaps his wings and climbs into the air to hover above them, disturbing the water with every flap of his great grey wings.]

Wouldn't be the first or last time we've been electrocuted...

[he watches shiro spread his wings, eyebrows shooting up despite himself. he's never been a huge fan of dragon-types in the way lance was, but he can admit when something's impressive. hell, even zinnia's terrifying salamence was majestic and beautiful in the way it almost killed him.]

Right! You want any rules from my end? I'll try not to beat your ass too thoroughly!

[He pleasantly hums as he situations himself between her legs, adjusting himself so that he's stable and she's comfortable.]

Y'ain't never left me unsatisfied.

[He murmurs the words as he watches her face with half-lidded eyes, his hips pressing forward against her—though his erection slips up against her slit, more than into it. Rubbing against the slickness of her, as he shudders slightly, his mouth hanging open as he puffs out a breath. Drawing his hips back again, he angles himself once more and nudges at her entrance.

With practiced aim, he presses in, his head lifting and tilting back as he slips his eyes closed, letting her warmth envelop him physically and emotionally. It's ridiculous to him how different it is sleeping with her versus what he's experienced with others. Not that the other times he's gotten laid wasn't enjoyable, but there's something different about sleeping with someone you love. Someone you have such a bond with—the emotional connectivity enhances the physical, and it's incredible.]

Cecelia shrugs, her chin propped up primly by her hands.

"That's about as much as you'll get from me, I'm afraid. One of the fool victims wandered up to me expecting me to know a thing about it -- as if I'm some pilferer!" She scoffs, her face starting to redden with the memory. "The nerve, honestly. Without bothering to borrow a robe to cover up, even...!"

I mean...to keep it that way.

[any bravado she means to have is a bit undercut by how breathless and affected she is by penetration. she braces as she always does, because it's never very comfortable at the start, but when he's settled in there and basking, she can find means to relax, too. this sort of thing...the profoundness doesn't seem to wear off, no matter how many times they go at it. because unlike Guzma, a moment like this is something she's only ever shared with him. but like him, she too grasps the greater comfort in their connection beyond the obvious, physical one at-hand.

she trusts him. he's done nothing but be patient and good to her like this, and it delights her to know he's happy with her, too. it's why, after taking that moment to relish him just being there in her, she draws a knee up to better accommodate him when he gets down to it, watching the passion play out on his expression, ears full of the sound of him.

eventually, her voice takes a note of urgency when she's close to climax, an unintended signal for him to hurry up or be left in the dust to catch up at his own leisure. it won't bother her either way, because she's having a fine time of things throughout, and even after he's come down from his own, she's flush and radiant and content to let him come to rest beside her, leaving soft, idle kisses along his shoulder and his jaw.

in the midst of a pleased murmur:] That was nice.

[That last remark gains her attention. Go wrong can mean a lot of things, sure. In a place like this, however, Sal's learned how deeply out of hand things can really get; take Jeopardy, for example.]

Sometimes they do. You trying to say that you're the type to jump in and help out?

[A raise of an eyebrow. There's other types of people too, those who see a situation go sideways and manage some way to cash in on it.]

There's plenty of codes to live by, after all, and not all of them are real nice.

[If someone told him when he arrived that he'd be so addicted and intoxicated with the affection from Lucina he'd think them mental. Yet, here he is, drinking every bit of warmth and love she'll give him. Pouring himself into her time and again, feeling satisfied yet wanting all the more. That fire inside him wild and hot, and every little noise, sigh, and movement she makes stokes its flames. Like a can of gasoline to a bon fire, her own approaching climax ushers in his to fruition, and so they finish together.

Even as he's coming down from his orgasm, those waning waves of pleasure that crest over his entire body, her tender kisses excite him and make his already thumping heart flutter with warmth. His nerves tingle, raising bumps across his skin. His eyes are closed as he's catching his breath and basking in the afterglow and her tender love, but a smirk forms when he hears her.]

Mmm...s'always nice with you.

[He peeks at her with one eye as he lifts a hand to cup the back of her neck, his fingers weaving into her long, soft hair. The moment's almost unreal with how soft and romantic it is, and Guzma pushes the latter part from his mind--particularly when there's suddenly a rattling at the bathroom door.

Right...Pinsir...]

Edited 2020-02-05 01:20 (UTC)

[his fingers against her neck sends fresh tingles in much the way her kisses to him did, and she squirms a little, enjoying the feeling.

until the scraping and clawing at the door. her expression scrunches for a moment, still addled with their lovemaking and uncertain of what she's hearing, eventually tilting her head to peer in the direction of the sound before realizing.]

Ah...oh. [woops.] He's...going to be angry, isn't he?

When isn't he?

[Guzma groans as he sits up. Here he just wanted to enjoy Lucina lavishing attention on him!! Thanks Pinsir!! He scoots to the edge of the bed to look at his discarded things till he spots the Ultra Ball he needs.]

Hopefully he won't put up too much of a fuss.

[He's still so warm and airy, and he's not exactly in the mood to naked wrestle his damn Pokémon! Grabbing the ball, he cautiously approaches the door, removing the chair, opening the door, and--]

Pinsir!! Goddammit--YO!!

[Sure enough the gremlin in question bursts forth, trying to swat the ball from Guzma's hand, clearly agitated by being locked in the bathroom, and maybe having to listen to the two of them! But it makes it difficult for Guzma to hit him with the return beam from the ball when this idiot bug is swiping at him every time he tries to.]

[gods.

Lucina grimaces, watching the struggle. Pinsir really is a wild child. she can only watch for so long before being compelled to move and leave the comfort of the bed. she peels a pillowcase off its pillow and winds it up a bit, then, crouching and getting near, snares one of Pinsir's swiping claws and yanks taut.]

Now! Go, go! [before either of them realize how stupid they look!!]

That kind of sounds amazing.

[Keith agrees with a grin. He likes nature, likes the quiet of it. He likes time alone with Shiro too, and yeah, all of it together? Perfect.

The grin on Shiro's face is infectious, and Keith quickens his pace to keep up with him.]

We could. Recharge a little every now and again. A little stillness isn't so bad.

[A lesson he learned in two years on a space whale.]

[He shakes his head before leaning his head back against the wall of the sauna.]

Not exactly. I know exactly the type you're thinking of, but I don't tell people that money will fall into their laps if they work hard, or that if they just think the right thoughts everything bad will stop happening to them.

It's predatory.

I primarily talk about how to get involved in civic engagement, I talk about the various imPort disasters and how it affects regular citizens, I open my talks up for questions not to me, but to my audience.

I never claim to be the smartest person in the room.

Trust me, it doesn't help when they're tearing you open to replace some of your innards.

Who are your "they", if I might ask.

[So he can imagine brutally murdering them later. Thanks.]

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