maskormenacelogs | i have no song lyrics for a title

"I, I don't know," he admits. "Only, one day...Rex said we had to pack things up, and move...move down the street. I don't know why, but...but the paper that has our names on it? And Cassandra's...and yours."

Is he wrong? Was that a paper for something else? He can't think of anything else, but it's possible he's wrong. He bites his lip for a second, worried he's making something up by mistake.

"I should double-check. Maybe I'm wrong. Sorry. I just--I can't think of another reason your name would be...with ours? Like that, I mean. I don't know."

Kanan waves a hand in a vague gesture of dismissal.

"Don't worry about it, Marty. I'm not planning on going anywhere, regardless. No point in going to a whole different city - or even across town - just to sleep."

He hesitates. Leaving things as they are is the sensible answer, but for some reason, it doesn't sit right in him. Even Dio, who was such a rover and rambler that Martin could probably count the number of times he actually slept at the house on one hand, still came back to settle now and then.

"Maybe..." He bites his lip for a second. "Maybe you could keep your things there, anyway? And if you needed something to eat, we have a lot. It wouldn't be bad. Right?"

"I don't really own anything," Kanan points out. Which is true - even back home, he could've fit all his possessions in one bag. He's got a couple changes of clothes, his lightsaber, and... that's basically it.

But he understands what Martin is offering. He's not sure if he wants to do something like that - settle in somewhere, with other people. But he appreciates the offer, at least.

"I... can think about it. Who all lives with you? I wouldn't be an imposition, would I?"

"Me and Rex," he says. "And Cassandra. And, um, a lady named Circe. I don't know her very well, but she's nice."

Nice enough to have not completely freaked out at his conjuring. That was good.

"There's a whole empty room there that's probably yours. I don't think it would be bad for you to have it. Do you want to see?"

It takes a second.

"Er...I-I mean..."

Kanan thinks about it for a moment. Marty means well, that's for sure. And Rex is there too, so he can always talk to him about it.

"Sure, kiddo, I'll go with you and check it out. See if the others are okay with it," he says, ignoring the minor faux pas.

For some reason, this acceptance lifts Martin's spirits: he mumbles something and then hastens to go fetch his coat before meeting Kanan at the door and setting off. Thankfully after months and months, Martin knows the route back to the neighborhood very well. And for how chilly it is, he walks briskly.

"Rex might not be home yet," he says, just now realizing it. "But Cassandra might be. Do you know her already?"

Kanan thinks for a moment. "I think we've spoken a couple of times, on the network at least. She seems all right."

Nice doesn't seem like a very applicable word, but that's not necessarily bad.

That much is a relief to hear; he'd hate to find out there's animosity between them -- or really, any of the people he's grown close to. It'd be a complication too big to really process on his own, let alone try to pick a side.

"She knows a whole lot," he says. "About here, and just...a lot of things. Food and clothes and stuff. She got me my jacket..."

"I'm glad you've got some people who know a lot about this world," Kanan says with a laugh. "Because it's definitely not my area of expertise. Or Rex's, I imagine."

"Mine, either."

It's not as alarming, knowing Kanan is a bit lost in this world as it would be if it were, say, Rex or Andy. If they are, they hide it well for his sake.

"I think I've been here for a...a really long time now, but things still confuse me. Or...I guess I just maybe can't figure out things fast enough. I don't know."

He lets out a breath in a puff, the cold air making it a little bit of steam.

"Most every other kid in the center seems smarter about things..."

"Most of the kids in the center have lived here all their lives. If the situation was reversed - if some of those kids ended up in your world - I bet you'd suddenly be the smart one," Kanan points out with a shrug.

"Personally, I don't think I'll ever get used to a lot of things about this world. Like the holidays!" He shakes his head faintly. "They have a holiday for everything, I think."

"Maybe it's because there's so much food to eat," Martin suggests, and as if timed, his eyes catch sight of a diner on the corner they're approaching. Across from that diner, a cafe. The supermarket's not far from here, either.

"If they didn't make enough holidays to eat all the food, it'd all go to waste..."

"You may have a point there," Kanan says with a smile. "I was also thinking about how much freedom the people have here. They have lots of time on their hands, so why not make up a few holidays to keep themselves entertained?"

Right... An entire lifetime to do as they please. It's like what he and Rex were talking about back at the aquarium, about what they'd do if they had just as much gumption to be like that.

"...Would you?" Martin peeks over Kanan's way curiously. "I mean--having all that time. Being able to...do whatever you want. Would you make holidays too?"

Kanan considers that for a moment. “If I had the ability to choose... I might. Why not make reasons to celebrate? Come up with excuses to spend time with the people I love? My family? That’s what I’d want to do, if I could.”

Martin thinks about that. About what it'd be like if Darkovs didn't have to train or hunt or kill. If all they had was time together. What would it be like? Darkov holidays...

Would they even get along? When it came to Alex, to Gracia...even Vincent, who would probably just not bother at all. And Aunt Sofia...

More time with all of them. Would that be better? Without the hunt to bind them, would there be anything else to relate to beyond blood?

He doesn't have too long to worry on it before they've arrived at the familiar neighborhood street. They almost make it right up to the house before Martin thinks to speak to it -- he often forgets Kanan's blindness like this.

"Oh--so. So...when the government told us to move, they just...made us go to a house on the same street. It's...mostly the same. Outside looks the same. Inside is a little mixed up. But I don't think it's bad."

"Just as long as it's not too cluttered," Kanan says with a faint smile.

"So what about you? Would you bring anyone from home to this world, and celebrate holidays with them if you could?"

Clutter is the last problem in house number 4, considering Rex. If anything, the only hazard is if Andy appears without him and starts leaving things laying around carelessly, and even then, he'd not be far behind to pick it all up. And iron it. Or wash it. Or both.

He'd tell him so, but Kanan brought up holidays again. Martin hesitates to answer.

"Um." He and Archie spoke of this, late in the night, after he'd feared a cousin arriving unknown to him. If Alex truly did come here alone, that'd be...bad.

"I, I don't know," he admits feebly. "Maybe my sister. If she'd like this sort of thing...I don't know. It's just-- a lot different. Here--"

He interrupts himself to turn up the path to the house, pulling a key out of his pocket to get them inside.

"It is pretty different," he admits with a laugh. "Even from what I'm used to."

As they step inside, Kanan puts a gentle hand on Martin's shoulder.

"If I'm going to stay here, I'll need some help - can you tell me where things are? I'll have to memorize it."

Living with Rex has gotten Martin more comfortable with shoulder touches, so beyond an initial start, he has no issue with Kanan keeping hold there as he takes the lead. He's not much by way of tour guide, but then, he doesn't really need to be; this house is still pretty sparse even with four inhabitants -- most of them aren't much for decorations.

He covers the rooms and major landmarks -- tables, the fish, furniture that may cross his path -- before heading up the stairs to the hall of rooms.

"This is the empty one," he reports once they've reached its threshold. "It has the same furniture as Rex's and mine, in the same spots." Because who rearranges things, anyway?

"Well... I appreciate the invite," Kanan says after listening to Martin's guided tour and making note of all the major furniture locations.

"I don't know how often I'll actually sleep here, but... it's nice to know it's here if I need it."

"And there's food," Martin adds. "I mean--if you want. It's not always a big dinner with many people, but...if you're hungry, you can come here if you want."

He's not really sure why he's so compelled to insist -- in fact, in realizing he's being a bit pushy, he swallows, his shoulders shrugging up.

"But-but whatever you want is fine, too. Sorry."

"Don't apologize," Kanan says immediately, and then pauses. Smiles faintly.

"It's actually nice to know someone cares enough to want me around."

"..."

Martin frowns. That sounds like something he'd say, himself. Why wouldn't people want Kanan around? Is it about that party-thing? With the people he didn't get along with? There's no one like that here, he thinks. Hopes? No one's said so around him...

"I...I don't think anyone here would mind," he says, scratching at his elbow. "I mean. You're nice. So it's good."

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