sixteen just held such better days

[admemoriam]

WHO: Noah Czerny admemoriam, various others, and open
WHERE: De Chima and Raven Camp
WHEN: The month of July
WHAT: Catch-all log
WARNINGS: Will add as needed

[Starters within. PP me at gizmatico if you want your own!]

Comments

[july 4th; closed to raven camp]

[admemoriam]

[He comes home Monday morning, figurative tail between his legs, still wearing Cosima's sweatshirt in spite of the summer heat. Everything about him looks pale and small and transparent, but he leaves sneaker footprints in the driveway. The front door feels like a gaping maw, and he may or may not be avoiding it. Either way, he's ready to apologize - to everyone. He figures they must be just as infuriated with his disappearance as they are with his treatment of Matthew and Ronan, but some ghostly habits are hard to let go of.

He quickly hunches his shoulders up at anyone who approaches him, a gesture of both defense and shame. Sorry, sorry, I'm sorry.]

[unguibusetrostro]

[He knows that Noah is back.

But he waits.

It's relatively late in the morning when he drops a box in front of him. Inside is bag of candy and a glitter $1 snowglobe of De Chima. Happy Birthday goes unsaid.]

[admemoriam]

[He flinches at the sound of the box, but doesn't look up. It's Ronan, he knows it's Ronan, and his mouth has suddenly gone completely dry. His shoulders hunch even further, nearly reaching his ears.

The box gets opened in silence, and as he clutches the snowglobe between his hands, Noah finally takes in a slow breath.]

I'm sorry.

[unguibusetrostro]

[He looks down at Noah, his head tipped up just a little. There's so much on his fact that speaks to arrogance, to rage.

But he doesn't want to keep this fight going. He knows he has the energy for it, the ability to do it. But actually enduring it isn't something he wants to put the rest of the people who live here through.

And mostly he doesn't want to. Mostly, he doesn't like the idea.]

Yeah.

[That doesn't mean he'll apologize. That's sometimes as good as anyone will get from Ronan.]

[admemoriam]

I can leave if you want.

[He says it to the yard, to the trees, to the sky, anywhere but at the imposing presence over his shoulder. Every fiber of his unreal, unnatural being wants to stay in this beautiful house, but not if the house doesn't want him back. All of these people are so precious to him, and they should have all the comfort and ease they can get. Noah's still a dead thing - he's not safe for people like Matthew.]

[dreamkid]

[ When Matthew spots him from a window, it only takes him seconds to come barreling out into the yard, very nearly tripping over the puppy who decides to come with him. ]

Noah!

[ He's nothing but pleased to see him, relieved and happy all at once. He grabs Noah's hands in his excitement, oblivious to the meaning behind the other boy's shrinking posture. ]

Noah, you're back!

[admemoriam]

[Noah lets Matthew take his hands - lets him shout, and carry on - but it takes him several moments to finally warm up to the boy's enthusiasm and smile back. Once he does, there's only one thing that he can bring himself to say.]

I'm sorry.

[dreamkid]

[ Matthew gives an immediate, dismissive shake of his curly head. ]

It's fine, it's fine. It's okay if you had to get out of here for a while.

[ He thinks that's why Noah is apologizing. And he does understand why he left, sort of. Not entirely--because he's still not sure what the fight was about--but enough that he doesn't feel like a further explanation has to be necessary. ]

[admemoriam]

[He shakes his head, fighting the urge to sink back into the shadows of the porch. Matthew's hands are too warm.]

I'm sorry I made you sad. And I'm sorry I told Ronan about... [He swallows.] I didn't mean to.

[oceiteres]

[ Blue spots Noah first over a large glass of water, which she very promptly discards on the nearest flat surface. ] Noah! [ Probably a bit difficult to tell whether her voice indicates upset or frustration or concern. Or all the above. It could easily be all the above, as this is Blue we're talking about here.

She strides over, altogether no-nonsense, and grabs him in what amounts to a bear hug from a tiny, tiny bear cub. ] I was worried about you! [ Still unclear if she's upset or just venting some of her worries. ]

[admemoriam]

[Noah lets out a small noise of surprise, but it only takes him a moment to extract his arms and wrap them around her in turn. He settles his face against her soft hair, and feels her stormy emotions brush against his own mind.]

Hi. [A pause.] I'm sorry.

[oceiteres]

[ It's all a jumble, but there's not much in the way of anger at the surface. Not now. ]

I accept your apology. Because I was worried sick. [ She clarifies because she doesn't think he should have to apologize for leaving if he needed to go. But: ] You could've said something.

[admemoriam]

[He almost shakes his head, but he's too comfortable with his nose pressed against her ear.]

I fought with Ronan.

[july 1st; closed to Breeze]

[admemoriam]

[The Jmart parking lot is empty this Friday evening, a suburban wasteland even in this strange world, but it's more than suitable for this duo's purposes. Under the fading sunlight, Noah drops his board down with a clatter, and steps up to test his weight on it.]

No, see, we wouldn't even have pop punk without Green Day. They totally paved the way for, like, faux-apathetic teen rebellion music.

[fayzedandconfused]

[ Breeze sighs, dropping her own board. She can't believe they're still talking about this, and she's wondering how she ever thought this guy was like Sam. Although Sam would probably argue in favor of Green Day, too. Boys. ]

Look, if they didn't exist, some other person would have come up with it eventually.

[admemoriam]

Except no one did, or else we wouldn't have electric synth-jazz here.

[He rolls a few feet, looking back at her with a wrinkled nose.]

[fayzedandconfused]

But we do have hoverboards.

[ So it's a fair trade-off, in her opinion. She executes an easy ollie on her board and grins when she lands it. ] Hah! [ Honestly, where's her sponsors and magazine covers?? ]

[july 2nd; closed to Cosima; cw drug mention]

[admemoriam]

[Noah stretches his arms out behind him, leaning back against the patio railing. His socked toes wiggle.]

I'd still pick Gandalf. Like, yeah, the hobbits would be fun, but imagine smoking a joint with some old all-knowing dude. It would be, like, enlightening.

[doubleblind]

[Cosima's sitting on the ground cross-legged, a well-loved copy of Lord of the Rings open in her lap. She gestures with one hand, punctuating her point. This is a very serious and important debate.]

Sure, yeah, I bet he gets super philosophical on a trip, but! Would he bring snacks? No. No, he wouldn't. The hobbits have all the snacks.

[admemoriam]

But would they bring good snacks?

[He sticks one finger in the air, like he's making a dramatic argument. This shit is academic.]

They'd probably bring, like, a potato. No one wants to just eat a potato.

[doubleblind]

[Cosima's immediately shaking her head, mock horrified at Noah's extremely wrong opinions of potatoes.]

Dude, potatoes are great. They're versatile! Think of all the different ways you can cook potatoes?

[July 19th; evening]

[dreamkid]

[ Matthew doesn't usually like to be alone. He's much more himself when he's around others, when laughter becomes a contagious thing.

So it's a little odd that he's alone now, sprawled across the driver's seat of his car with the top rolled down and the seat pushed back as far as it will go. A cheerful Irish reel plays from the speakers, floating pleasantly across the lawn.

He's lost track of time out here, watching the stars appear one by one, tapping his feet and fingers to the music. ]

[admemoriam]

[Noah hears the music as soon as he gets out of Adam's car, and once he sees the glow of bright yellow out in the firefly-lit lawn, he calls out a thank you and strolls over towards the Mini Coop. In his work uniform, he looks a bit more like a Trick-or-Treater than a member of the adult workforce.]

Hey.

[It's not the witty, charming greeting he would usually come up with for the object of his last week's thoughts, but it's as much as he can manage with the plastic fangs still secured to his front teeth.]

[dreamkid]

[ Matthew blinks when a vampire comes into his field of vision, then--you guessed it--laughs and pulls himself up. ]

Hey, Noah. Nice teeth!

[ He folds his arms over the door, giving the other boy a warm grin. It's not the smile of a boy who's been worrying about a kiss that didn't happen. It doesn't even seem like he's been thinking about it, which has been true of his behavior ever since the event failed to occur. ]

I had a song stuck in my head.

[ That would be the unprompted explanation for why he's sitting in his stationary car by himself in the dark, just in case Noah was wondering. ]

[admemoriam]

[That's okay, because Noah's been doing enough worrying for the both of him. Not because he's genuinely upset about not kissing Matthew Lynch. More like...

Okay, not the time to get into it.]

I like it. [And he's already coming around the front of the car to hop into the passenger seat.] It sounds like fun.