[Their places were reversed, not too long ago, and Tetsuo let the bitterness consume him.
It'd been a few years, maybe, since the mere sight of Kaneda didn't send him into a rage deep down. Everything was always better without him!
Or so he'd thought. It'd taken actually getting tossed to the curb and traded out for someone better to drive the point home, leaving him crying and screaming internally at the world on the bed, fury and loathing wrapping themselves down to the core of his being, and not even understanding why it bothered him so much.
It took dying to get Kaneda to give a damn again.
He could only imagine how it must feel for Amada now. In fact, he'd been counting on it; that small part of him left with enough fire to find vengeful thoughts looked back on it with a dark satisfaction. Suck it. And, another part with extreme trepidation. What was he going to do...?
Kaneda's not here. But would it really change anything if he was? He never stopped the kid from trying to kill him before. If it'd been him instead of Pan who did it, would Kaneda still give a shit? Lost in his own racing mind, Tetsuo misses the fact Amada's trembling, but it's impossible to miss the shiver in his voice. The first real clue that something is still off about all this, and he still can't find what.
The longer Amada talks, the more blankly confused Tetsuo looks. It's just like with the candy when he ran away, just like with the mug before, and that bowl. He can't even begin to understand that position, too mired in his own worldview.]
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It'd been a few years, maybe, since the mere sight of Kaneda didn't send him into a rage deep down. Everything was always better without him!
Or so he'd thought. It'd taken actually getting tossed to the curb and traded out for someone better to drive the point home, leaving him crying and screaming internally at the world on the bed, fury and loathing wrapping themselves down to the core of his being, and not even understanding why it bothered him so much.
It took dying to get Kaneda to give a damn again.
He could only imagine how it must feel for Amada now. In fact, he'd been counting on it; that small part of him left with enough fire to find vengeful thoughts looked back on it with a dark satisfaction. Suck it. And, another part with extreme trepidation. What was he going to do...?
Kaneda's not here. But would it really change anything if he was? He never stopped the kid from trying to kill him before. If it'd been him instead of Pan who did it, would Kaneda still give a shit? Lost in his own racing mind, Tetsuo misses the fact Amada's trembling, but it's impossible to miss the shiver in his voice. The first real clue that something is still off about all this, and he still can't find what.
The longer Amada talks, the more blankly confused Tetsuo looks. It's just like with the candy when he ran away, just like with the mug before, and that bowl. He can't even begin to understand that position, too mired in his own worldview.]
...what?
[He matches quiet anxiety with quiet disbelief.]