maskormenacelogs | party for two

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party for two

WHO: Owen Burnett & the Red Plains Rider
WHERE: Maurtia Falls #3
WHEN: some vague time after July's block party but when nothing's happening
WHAT: Red Plains Rider is gonna get some culture beaten into her whether she likes it or not. aka time for the world's weirdest tea party
WARNINGS: ridiculousness

If Owen was going to teach Red Plains Rider the proper way to drink tea, then he was going to do everything by the book. As such, Owen had a large assortment of tea leaves and some loose leaf tea sitting out on the table, as well as a nice, filtered teapot, a slightly less nice unfiltered teapot, measuring spoons, a tea-ball or two, milk, sugar, honey, a few packets of artificial sweetener, and a few cups and saucers from the nice (though secondhand) china that Owen had managed to pick up.

The crappy plastic dollar store tiaras were totally Puck's influence seeping through a bit. Whoops. But hey, she said that it was okay if they had pretty tiaras, they were going to have pretty tiaras.

She should be here soon. He checked his watch for clarification on the time, then started to move the tea sandwiches (he had three kinds: watercress, tomato and cheddar, and shrimp salad) to the table. Again, if Owen was going to do this then dammit, he was going to do it right. (Plus, a small secret part of him just wanted to see Red Plains Rider in a tiara. He would stomach looking ridiculous if she looked ridiculous as well).

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Red had almost forgot about this whole tea thing until she received a message from Mister Burnett. She almost even replied back to forget it, but some semblance of politeness won out and she agreed to show up at his place, which was surprisingly not too far away.

Not having anything better to wear, she showed up in her usual garb, but she at least put on her cleanest clothes for the occasion and even gave her hat a cursory wipe down. She almost brought both her rifle and pistol, but opted just for the pistol. Having a rifle leaning against a table holding a dainty pot of tea seemed disturbing for some reason.

She stood on the stoop for an awkward moment before ringing the door bell, glancing around almost guiltily for witnesses.

As he heard the doorbell, Owen set the platter of tea sandwiches on the table as he walked over to the door. Opening it, he briefly nodded at Red. They made a bizarre couple, as Owen was wearing a navy blue suit with a dull red tie (though, thankfully, didn't have one of the tiaras on. That was for later.)

"Red Plains Rider," said with a small nod. "Please, come in." And he held the door open for her-the table, decked out to the nines with tea party everything, was in sight of the door. "I trust you have been well recently?"

"Howdy," she answered back, tilting her hat briefly at him. As soon as that pleasantry is taken care of, her gaze drifted into the residence as she stepped in, eyes almost immediately drawn to the table. She sort of hoped she was hallucinating half the stuff she was seeing on there.

"Yeh, been fine. I ain't one fer gettin' sick..." she answered him honestly, since she literally can't, but it probably just sounded like a person overly cocky about there health. Or, at least, it would have sounded like that if she didn't sound more distracted as she spotted what she was relatively sure were, in fact, tiaras. She hasn't actually ever seen any in real life, real or plastic, but she's pretty sure that's generally how they look. She turned her head to silently dead eye him in disbelief.

Owen just remains completely stone-faced as Red trails off, looking at the tiaras. He, of course, purposefully interprets her as disbelief at something different. He's made up his mind, he's going to be exceedingly matter-of-fact and serious about all of this, including the tiny little plastic tiaras.

"I do hope you don't mind the sandwiches. One of the tea sandwiches is shrimp salad, do you have a seafood allergy?" Because of course that's what she's staring at in disbelief, certainly not anything else.

She has no idea how to respond. He either has a great poker face or he had not been kidding during their conversation that inspired this.

Bagropa, let it be the former. Fine, if he's going to play that game, she will, too. Maybe. He may win. Or maybe they'll both lose...

"Naw, I ain't got any. In fact, shrimp'll be nice. Ain't get that much back home, bein' a desert an' all..." She cleared her throat awkwardly, stepping toward the setting. She stopped, unsure if she should site or if she needed to be invited to first. Should she take off her hat? Okay, she'll take off her hat at least first, then she sat down like this was all perfectly normal.

They're both going to lose. Nobody will come out of this tea party with their dignity intact.

As he walked over to the table, Owen pulled out the chair for Red Plains Rider to sit. "I'll need to put the kettle on for the tea. But, before I do, I have a wide variety of assortment of tea on the table. Do you have any preferences or shall I explain the differences?"

He doubted Red Plains Rider had any preferences with regard to tea. Still, it didn't hurt to ask.

Hopefully there will be no pictures. But she can't even guarantee that, seeing as she has a picture of herself in embarrassing Mickey Mouse ears hanging in her bedroom.

She had been lowering herself when he suddenly was pulling out the chair, and she stumbled, looking at him with a startled sort of sharp look, as if she thought he had been intending for her to fall. But the way he stood and held the chair told her he was just being a gentleman. Weird guy.

Clearing her throat, she sat as if she hadn't just had that episode, and scooted the chair back in herself. "I ain't got no preference 'cause I ain't got no idea, but ya sure ya gotta explain 'em afore ya make a cup fer me?"

As Red stumbled, Owen almost instantly reached over to try and help...but, as she gave him the startled look he realized oh, she wasn't expecting him to pull out his chair, and returned his hand to his side. This would be a long tea party.

Of course he had to explain the different types of tea. How else was she going to know which to try? "Of course I do," said with a small nod, that stern expression still on his face.

And then Owen went into a very detailed, play-by-play explanation of all the different teas that I am way too damn lazy to write out, it's almost midnight over here, just roll with it. But it's a very detailed explanation that includes caffeine content, boiling temperature, how long each tea needs to be steeped, things like that. It's very long and very dry and probably the sort of explanation that Red stopped listening to halfway through. Feel free to have her cut him off in the middle, this is gonna take a while anyway.

It was the sort of explanation that Red stopped listening to halfway of a halfway through, and she eventually lifted a hand up between them, palm up as if trying to tell an oncoming car "STOP."

"...Yer makin' all that up for laughs, ain't ya? I've seen tea made afore. Ya just pour the water, put in a bag, an' pull it out. It ain't rocket science," she chuckled in disbelief. There was no way tea was this serious of a business.

Owen furrowed his brow, frown growing deeper. Of course he wasn't making it up. Why on Earth would she think he would do that to begin with? Her look of disbelief is perfectly countered by his stony frown.

"Of course I'm not making it up. I try to do everything with the finest precision and to the best of my ability. That includes knowing every precise detail on how tea is prepared." He's still frowning, as if he couldn't believe Red would suggest he was making it up to begin with.

She hadn't expect so much offense. Maybe tea was a big deal? At least maybe on his world. She's had to suffer through weirder more annoying traditions growing up with the Martians, this weren't worse or anything. But she also doesn't say sorry easy, so she merely tried to lighten to situation by saying in a slightly playful tone, "Is it somethin' ya needed to know fer yer job? What was it again . . . ? Burlesque show manager or somewhat? It'd explain these." She picked up a tiara, idly waving it at him.

As she mentions the burlesque...Owen can't help it. He blushes a little bit, struggling to regain composure. "Certainly not. It was simply something that I had to know for back home." He was fairly certain his knowledge would be wasted on the girls anyway. If they had any questions about drinks, it usually ended up with Owen answering 'no, don't mix that with whiskey, you'll vomit.'

"Already know you ain't in charge'a saloon girls back home, so what type'a job woulda ya be needin' to know tea about fer?" She kept hold of the tiara, leaning back in her chair, fussing with it, twirling it around in her fingers as she regarded him. "'Cept fer bein' a seller'a tea, reckon."

"Due to my job back home, there were moments where I helped out with regards to serving and preparing dinner." said with a small little smile on his face. His work with Mr. Xanatos usually ended up with Owen being a jack of all trades. "I know more about food than you realize."

"Ain't got no preconceived notions about ya to begin with, 'cept fer maybe yer ability ta ride an equine an' shootin' a gun," she said, quite truthfully, those being the only things she really cared about enough to judge someone on. Everything else was a dull non-issue. "So you were a butler or somethin' then?"

"Of a sort. I was Mr. Xanatos's assistant. I helped out with a wide assortment of duties and topics."

"Xanatos..." She ponders for a moment, pausing in the tiara twiddling, then it starts up again. "Reckon that name sounds familiar. He one'a us, too?"

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party for two

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