just a jackknife has old macheath, babe | closed

[criminallysane]

WHO: Carol Danvers and the Joker
WHERE: A tea shop in De Chima
WHEN: Friday, January 3rd. Late afternoon.
WHAT: A wayward clown visits his probation officer
WARNINGS: Standard Joker warnings: language, clowns, possible violence and/or manipulation attempts, etc.



The Joker has learned to recognize the sound of her footsteps, though he never knows when or where he'll hear them. One of the joys of his post-Christmas life is that Carol Danvers, probation officer extraordinaire, might pop up at any moment to check on him, like some absurdly attractive combination of Batman and Whack-A-Mole. There's never any warning when she decides to do a surprise check. Just those footsteps, and the muted twitch of pleasure they always stir in his belly.

He poisoned two cities. Unleashed a terrible virus of his own creation. Caused mayhem and terror! And in return for his trouble, he's been given daily contact with a showstopping blonde. Life truly is beautiful sometimes.

Today, he's arranged to do one of their regular check-ins over tea, mostly because he wants to see how Carol looks handling delicate bone china. Ten minutes before they're scheduled to meet, Joker is already settled in at a lace-smothered table in the back of an overly cutesy tea shop, and he's already placed an order for both of them. By the time he hears her footsteps on the wooden floor, a full tea spread is ready and waiting for her, including a three-tiered tray of savories and sweets that contains far too much for two people.

He rises from his chair, playing the gentleman, and offers a warm smile that suggests there's no one in the world he could possibly be more pleased to see.

"Ms. Danvers. You look absolutely enchanting." He moves to help her out of her coat. "I hope you don't mind that I took the liberty of ordering for us. Just hated to think of you waiting."

Comments

[usaf]

Carol can actually cook, just nothing so delicate as a quiche. You should taste her jambalaya. And hey, maybe he will get the chance to, if this plan goes well enough.

"That's a good idea. So long as you don't try anything off color," she says with a warning. "I'm sure the news will get back to me pretty quickly if you do." She isn't always a fan of crowds, so she stays away from most Swear Ins, but this once she might attend, just to keep an eye on things.

"We can do the weekend after. But you still have to jog. There's no ducking out of that part of the deal."

[criminallysane]

At her warning, Joker holds up both hands in a don't-shoot-I-surrender gesture. "I'll be good. Clown's honor." (And he really will be, too... Right up until the moment that a vampire Batman tries to eat him.) He knows that Carol, as his probation officer, has the right to shut down any and all travel plans. He also knows that she's right: anything he says or does probably will get back to her. He has no intention of breaking her fledgling trust in him over something as silly as a swear-in; he intends to save that for something really worthwhile. Some jokes, after all, only work once.

Damn shame about the jogging, though. If he didn't know better, he'd almost think she was insisting on it just to punish him, a bit of low-key quid pro quo: I offer companionship to you, you offer your physical suffering to me. But maybe he's just projecting.

He focuses on the good news: he gets to go to the swear-in, and he gets a day with her, too. If the price of all of that is a bit of running around in neon-colored jogging wear, so be it. She's worth it.

"I knew it," he says with a chuckle. "You are a sadist at heart! But all right, all right. For you and only you, I'll find a way to manage." His eyes and smile are bright now, almost warm. She's charming him, and it shows.

"Now, forgive me, dearest, but I've got to run. Auditioning a new act at five, and I need to set up the booby traps first." Another chuckle—there are no booby traps—as he pushes his chair back and rises to his feet. He'll square the bill for their meal at the front on his way out. "But you take your time with the scones." Then, as an afterthought: "Shall I call you from the swear-in, by the way? Assure you I'm behaving myself, ask about your day, all of that?"

[usaf]

When Joker stands, Carol stands too, not wanting to be on a different level from him. "Fine. Yeah. Call me to check in. And I'll get in touch with you about next weekend."

She grabs a scone to go and follows him to the front of the tea room.

"I think this can work, if we're both honest with each other." Not that Carol's not going to do some digging of her own to learn a little more about what Joker's history is like. Just consider it research.

[criminallysane]

In general, Joker dislikes it when people try to keep tabs on him, perhaps because so many have. He's spent too many years in prisons and asylums; he's been the squeakiest cog in too many machines. If you'd asked him two months ago if he might ever enjoy the thought of making nightly phone calls to "check in" with a probation officer, he'd have laughed himself right out of his wingtips.

But the idea of calling Carol every night? Of picking up the phone and knowing she'll be on the other end, with none of the neediness he might expect from Harley, and none of the hostility he might expect from most of his other associates? That suddenly seems oddly appealing, like a little bright spot to look forward to at the end of each day. He finds himself feeling strangely grateful that she said yes.

"I'm never been all that good at honesty," he admits, honestly. It's not as if that's a secret; there's no reason not to tell her. "But we'll go slowly, hm? Ease me into it. Two truths for every lie, perhaps." He gives her a wink, just to show he's teasing, then pulls out his wallet, counts off a few bills, and settles their ticket.

"And who knows? After a couple months of chatting with you, maybe I'll change my tune." He turns back to her as he tucks his wallet back into his pocket, wanting to see her face once more before she leaves. "Or maybe not! Could go either way." Though the look in his eyes suggests he might actually try, with her. At least for a little while. "Regardless... I appreciate that you're willing to give me a shot."