why do the bare minimum when you can overdo things [OPEN]

[fauxmarth]

WHO: the mysterious Prince of Kanada, assorted
WHERE: all over
WHEN: January
WHAT: Lucina's on social media damage control. Odin helps. many lives are enriched and cats saved.
WARNINGS: stupidity



A silly little rumor about some scattered pixels on the internet has spun wildly out of control, and now warring factions of overzealous Lucina fans have taken arms and pamphlets in protest (or support!) of a false relationship that vexes not only those targeted, but one Very Irritated Space Princess. Darin's forge has taken hits, as has the Aegis Force general post office box -- it can go on no longer. Lucina won't stand for it.

Fortunately, this is not a battle she must fight alone. And, in seeking the wisdom of her technically-younger-but-currently-elder cousin, the definitely great and questionably wise Odin Dark, her path was made clear:

Lucina must construct a false relationship -- create a mysterious and marketable figure to ensnare the voracious, hyperactive imaginations of her followers, and draw them off the scent of her dear, real friends. Unlike the mythological Marsha Brady where inspiration was drawn, this plan will succeed, because unlike said Brady, Lucina has Odin to help.

And so, clad in glittering velvet, a concealed and painted Falchion, and the most fanciful of hats and mustache, the mysterious Prince of faraway Kanada begins a brief campaign of appearances throughout the known imPortverse -- lingering just long enough to start a bit of gossip and make an impression and then leave.

All the while Lucina, internally, kind of wants to die of embarrassment. The things one must sacrifice for the sake of her friends... Maybe she will let Odin push Darin a bit.


In MAURTIA FALLS, Lucina takes care to fit in her fake-boyfriend time with her duties as a member of the Force, using said membership to her advantage. How else would she hear about fresh emergencies? Other heroes have swooped in before a Force member could get there before -- she's not setting a precedent here!

So, say you're out here doing just that: finding a crime underway and doing (or not doing) something about it when behold! From the shadows! The sound of steel being drawn and the sudden shifting of shadows giving way to glitter and...this guy! Here he comes! Whoa!


In HEROPA, where imPort sentiment is at its most positive, the Prince must make himself more accessible to the people at-large...but in small doses. Not only is black velvet a bit stifling even in a Florida winter, but the more she's put in the position to talk, the more likely her cover will be blown! And the theater makeup applying the mustache won't last forever if she's sweating!

Perhaps you find her in just that situation -- and it's not uncommon! New imPorts get rushed like this all the time, after all.

"You are all very, very kind," she says, trying to deepen her voice. "I thank you. But I must away -- I have a date. With...with Princess Lucina..."

She wants to die.


In DE CHIMA, where Lucina volunteers free time at the O'Malley Clinic, she must take care to curate appearances on her...actual end. It's silly, but the amount of flowers and treats she's ordered for herself under aliases has got to start getting noticeable by now, right? Considering the number of flower arrangements now lining the waiting room and office spaces? It's kind of fun getting presents! Just...not like this. Yet she must really make a show of being quite over the moon about it, otherwise it'll just seem suspicious!

Suspicious like...like never seeing the actual sender of these gifts! Ha ha! What!

See that big bouquet of multicolored daisies walking down the sidewalk? Lucina's definitely behind that! And she can't really see precisely when the light's changing, so perhaps tipping her off before she walks off into traffic would be nice...?


In NONAH more Princely do-gooding is done -- as well as exploring; this is her least-traversed town by a long shot, so it's kind of...liberating! To bound rooftop to rooftop and observe the goings-on. She'll even deign to swoop down to support even mundane troubles! Flat tire? Dog won't leave the dog park? Need to get all these groceries carried in one trip? Let the gallant Prince of Kanada be your support! It's...normal do-gooding! Just...with a bad false voice!

Also: No one told her Nonah has good yogurt? This is really good yogurt; the Prince of Kanada will also take some time to perch on the lip of a water fountain to enjoy some yogurt.

Comments

FOR ODIN:

[fauxmarth]

I'll be needing that, too...

[Lucina plucks the cocked hat off her cousin's head and sees to carefully placing it atop her own without mucking up the work done to get the wig in place. the initial work is done -- Odin being gracious enough to stand in as this mysterious prince for some candids that'll go far online once the plan is in motion -- but now the real work has to get started.

she fidgets with it a bit, squinting at herself in the mirror before looking to him:]

Does this look crooked? Or is it the mustache?

[shadowglitter]

[ So long, sweet hat. Odin makes a startled noise of distress when Lucina takes his hat away, but that's only because he'd been really getting into the fantasy of being a secret prince with a double life. You know - like he already is. As Odin Dark. Retainer to the youngest Lord of Nohr, despite being somewhere down the line of exaltation in Ylisse.

It's fine, don't worry about it. He immediately gets over the loss of his disguise when he sees how great it looks on Lucina. ]

You look truly retched. Absolutely disgusting. Horrible - but in a way that's very suave, very handsome. Dapper. You look like a ladies man, just like Inigo! He was a huge part of my inspiration here.

[ he fidgets with Lucina's new hat, straightening it out a little, then steps back, nodding slowly. ]

If I had half of your charm, I would revolutionize the world of modelling. And also the world of swashbuckling. Because you also look like a pirate.

[fauxmarth]

I'd imagine pirates forego a lot of these extra layers, and not just for the sake of padding out a masculine figure... [she rolls her shoulder, still trying to get used to so much clothing. still--isn't this the sort of thing she'd intended to do upon setting foot back in Ylisse's past? to pass as mysterious hero Marth, she'd need more than one of Gerome's masks...

and just like now, it takes more than a hat and a wig! she's just going to have to suck it up and commit. no backing down now!]

Like Inigo, huh... [gods. she's not sure she likes that comparison for herself? but then, she's not trying to be herself here, is she? so...good?? she scratches at the bridge of her nose before setting the mask atop it.]

I guess I ought to keep him closely in-mind for this, especially in a crowd. It'll make me as unknown, charming, and...strangely repellent in a pinch, I gather. [just like Inigo!!!!!]

NONAH

[forgeabettertomorrow]

[So, despite the sudden influx of angry fanboys at the start of the month, things had actually quieted down at the forge, for the most part. Sure, Darin would come to work and find more angry flyers aimed at his non-existent relationship with Lucina plastered all over the building, but at least he had plenty of paper to burn when it got unreasonably cold, right?]

[That, and some of those "Blue Believer" flyers were kind of cool looking. Darin might have kept a couple of those simply for aesthetic purposes. Plus, nothing bad came of the whole media circus...thing. If anything, this was not a funny anecdote to him. Something he could laugh at down the road.]

[So, imagine his surprise when he shows up to the forge to see the Purple Pimpernel or whoever this was, removing a fresh batch of flyers from his forge. He strolls up casually with a to-go cup of hot chocolate and sips it, wondering what batch of fresh hell awaits him today.]

Hey there, friend. You certainly look busy there.

[fauxmarth]

[the noble prince startles a bit, having been so caught up with the purplest of prose that was ever typed in Book Antiqua font on this flyer when Darin arrives; he yanks the paper off and crumples it in hand in the same motion it takes to turn on his heel and come to face him.

...ah.

oh.

uh.

wait. does she...break character? or? or would he suspect she's been pasting these? uh? er--

he clears his throat.]

Gr-greetings, Master Darin. I've...heard much about you. [...] A bit too much by way of slander, I'm afraid. [he opens his hand a bit to expose the crumpled page for emphasis.]

I've decided to hasten their removal. It's unseemly.

1/2

[forgeabettertomorrow]

[forgeabettertomorrow]

[This is...]

[...Is this happening?]

[Oh gods this is happening.]

[Does she really think that--]

[Haaaahahahahahahahaha oh wow.]

[Okay then. We're doing this, I guess??????]

Yeah...

What can I say? I'm used to my reputation preceding me.

You know my name but...I don't think we've been properly introduced...?

Heropa

[prayercycles]

[ Up until now, Fortunato's had a fairly average day. He's mostly seeing blurs, so he's had to use his cane, but he made his way to a church event and is now heading to the bus stop, not having met with much trouble. Times like this are always a little surreal- being able to go about his life peacefully.

Until he sees the crowd. For a second he thinks about turning around. But then- is that Lucina? It looks like it could be, that height, the cape...

And then he hears what the person is saying. So-

What. What is happening. Should he leave? He has no idea.

So there he is, watching this spectacle from some distance away, completely perplexed. Lucina has...a boyfriend...that looks somewhat like her? Maybe? He's so puzzled he's not noticing a few people turning and seeing him, not sure whether they recognize a little-known imPort or not. ]

[fauxmarth]

Ye-yes, thank you! I'll, I'll give her your warmest regards, yes. Please--excuse me. E-excuse...me...

[the prince squeezes through the throng of curious youths and finds himself at its end...and all but at Fortunato's feet.

he freezes for a beat, and for a minute, Lucina fears being caught! but...no? right?

he clears his throat.]

Pardon me, sir. [oh gods is this a low enough octave to still be believable?!] Would you happen to know the way to the inter-city porter-machine? I've yet to memorize the pathways.

[prayercycles]

[ Okay, this person is...still a lot like Lucina. And maybe it's only because of his previous thought process, but he kind of sounds like her, too. He doesn't want to make assumptions, especially with a group of fans in earshot, but...

Why would Lucina be in disguise? That doesn't seem right. ]

Um- [ He hears the bus in the distance. That's the easiest way, isn't it. ] This bus goes to it. Or- you could walk east.

[ At least if this person joins him he might have a chance of...figuring out what is possibly happening. ]

HEROPA

[patchricide]

[Perhaps it's because she's not human, and has a little more trouble telling these stubby-eared people apart from each other. Or perhaps it's because her mind blue-screens at the mention of 'a date with Princess Lucina'.]

[But for this brief, shining moment? Allura seems to be totally fooled.]

[All she sees is a new imPort in need of rescue, and luckily, she knows a little about how to go unnoticed. Like wearing a sun hat to draw attention away from the big ears underneath them. She wades around the edge of the crowd, and as she gets close, gets the attention of the 'prince' in a hissing whisper—]

Come this way! There's a street over here, which shouldn't have nearly so many people — right here, to your left!

[fauxmarth]

Eh-?!

[in the middle of this fray, the familiar note in the voice goes unnoticed, but it's still a call heard: the prince tilts and starts inching away, clutching the brim of his tri-fold hat to further obscure his face as he goes, arm poking free and flailing kind of helplessly as the rest of him is at a brief impasse.

ah, hells...!]

[patchricide]

[Inching?? We don't have time for inching! What kind of way is that to behave when you're running late for a date?!]

[Allura grabs the prince by the sleeve, and hauls him down a side road. The crowd follows, but the Altean leads them over a fence — yes, dragging the prince of Kanada straight through the air, if he doesn't jump on his own — and down a street that seems to have no people.]

[Actually, it's a bit of a strange area. It's a dead outdoor mall, not far from the lively streets. The shops are all still in fairly good condition, save for some weather damage and boarded-up windows. There's even a nice little courtyard with a fountain, which has since become a stagnant pool full of algae.]

[All of the shops seem to be from a time before the imPort influence, the closest modern equivalent to a ghost town.]

We should be safe from them here. Watch your step, though — there's quite a lot of puddles.

NONAH

[godkaru]

[Hikaru is still getting used to where everything is. It's been a day, but Fuu doesn't live in this town. She'll have to figure things out on her own. So she's out exploring, walking around. Taking note of streets and locations and... That. That is someone in full armor and cape on a fountain. Eating... yogurt?

Oh that's weird.

She steps up, a little nervous, but friendly.]

Um. Excuse me, could I... ask you a question?

[fauxmarth]

Hrmh-?

[mid-bite, the prince looks up, blinking behind the mask. Lucina might be in the middle of an overly elaborate charade in a misguided goodwill attempt at influencing social media here, but she'll never be too caught up in shenanigans to disregard a girl with this kind of atmosphere.

quickly swallowing the bite and swiping at a corner of his mouth, the prince offers an easy smile, sitting more upright.]

Of course. How may I be of help?

[godkaru]

Um.

[The nanites translating is taking some getting used to - she's sure she's speaking Japanese, but this person seems to understand just the same. It's weird!]

I was just wondering... where you got that yogurt? It looks good.

HEROPA

[khajidont]

[ Jaime's no stranger to wanting to flee from attention. He's done it in the past, plenty of times. But he has not, it must be said, resorted to taking on a different identity altogether and decide to fake being in a relationship. That's some Bruce Wayne shit right there.

He recognizes her a mile away, of course. How could he not? In fact, he's pretty dang sure the only reason others haven't caught on is the fact that imPorts are a weird enough bunch that it's feasible that this could happen. Why not? The crowd doesn't seem to want to relinquish her, though, so after watching her for a while, he feels moved to step in. ]

Yep! And I'm here to... escort... him? [ He looks at Lucina, wide-eyed. Are you supposed to be a boy right now? ] Him... to his date. Come along... [ Um. ] ...sir.

[ With that, he yanks Lucina away by her elbow and pushes through the crowd. ]

[fauxmarth]

I--oofh! Uh! Well-! Farewell, haha!

[this is an unexpected-yet-convenient rescue, isn't it! he'll not look a gift-horse in the mouth.

...uuuuuntil seeing who did the rescuing.

once safely dragged out of harm's way, the prince freezes, up, mouth twitching, brain buzzing. uh-oh. he...doesn't SUSPECT anything, does he?

just.

pretend he doesn't! assume!

after an aggressive bit of throat clearing and arm-yanking-away:] M-my thanks, stranger! I would've been there all day, were it not for that! Haha! Ha...!

[khajidont]

[ Jaime just fixes Lucina with a Look. The Look is visible even underneath his mask. It's a Look he had inherited from his mother, who inherited it from her mother, who inherited it from her mother, who inherited it from her mother. It's a look with pedigree. ]

I don't know whether I'm more offended that you think I'm that dense or that you were gonna lead me on a wild horse chase of thinking you were dating some mystery stranger.

De Chima

[darkpants_warmfeeling]

[Jacob Taylor, combat veteran and experienced hero with finely-honed reflexes, just got taken the fuck out by what appears to be a walking bushel of daisies. Staggering back, he shakes his head to dislodge the petals now stuck to his face before his eyes refocus.]

Sorry- sorry, I wasn't paying attention. You okay?

[He hasn't really taken note of who is holding the flowers yet, still thinking about the briefing he just came from.]

[fauxmarth]

Oofh!

[oh no. did she hit another wall?

...no, this wall is talking. it sounds like her boss!

with a grunt, Lucina hefts much of the weight to one arm so she can use the others to part the flowers and have a look, surprised to find the wall was, in fact, her boss.]

Oh! Gods, Jacob, forgive me! I...well. I absolutely wasn't looking where I was going, obviously...Are you alright? [oh no!!] You're not allergic to daisies, are you?

[darkpants_warmfeeling]

I'm fine. Definitely not allergic to daisies.

[He smiles slightly, and then the smile grows as he connects the flowers to the recent rumours going around about Lucina.]

Are those from the... Prince?

[It's not that Jacob doesn't think a new imPort called 'the Prince of Kanada' sounds suspicious, it's just that the Porter has sent so much weirder stuff their way in the past that he can't just rule it out.]

De Chima

[eloquentness]

After the fifth bouquet of roses delivered to the hospital, Iris has to wonder what's going on. Her poor nurses can't give away the extras to the patients fast enough, and that's with them actively trying. Even her office has a bouquet or two, addressed to Lucina from her mysterious boyfriend, and well - Iris doesn't know what's worse: the fact that he's so generous or the fact that this display would bankrupt any soul.

As she walks past a nurse's station, noting yet another extravagant display of roses and orchids, she stops by and rests her arms on the counter.

"Hey." She leans forward, brushing the roses aside to see her little sister better. "How can you get any work done with all of these?"

[fauxmarth]

"Eh-?"

Lucina looks up, blinking out of the glazed-eyed daze lines of text put her in. It's not even that she's been at this for hours, rather...she just gets very very bored when reading anything, let alone medical legalese.

"Oh, Iris!" She brightens right away, happy to see her. Iris is far removed from this nonsense -- a beacon of hope at the end of this sea of troubles. She just...has to wade through swaths of flowers to avoid the trouble, she supposes.

"With these?" The flowers? She fidgets in her seat uneasily. "Oh, I...I don't mind. It...brightens the place up! Doesn't it? Like working in a garden, rather than a white-walled office..." Her eyes wince. "Right?"

[eloquentness]

She ought to let that metaphor slide. After all, Iris used to work at a florist's, and had become comfortable both with numerous bouquets around her and long, arduous hours arranging them. At the same time, she can't help scrunching up her whole face at the thought.

"I guess." She can't bring herself to agree, but she's not going to dismiss it again. "It's the thought that counts in the end, and a lot of patients have loved the extra bouquets in their rooms..."

Even if, technically, said flowers weren't meant for them so much as one of their staff members.

"How're you holding up?" The flowers were addressed to her, anyway. "With all this uh - show of affection?"