KYLO REN (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
photophobic) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
maskormenacelogs2017-12-23 11:07 pm
photophobic) wrote in maskormenacelogs2017-12-23 11:07 pm
[OPEN] I won't shiver in the cold
WHO: Kylo 'too many issues and not enough tissues' Ren and... YOU?
WHERE: Various locations around De Chima
WHEN: Following the Porter's restoration
WHAT: An emotionally stunted manchild with superpowers moping around a lot
WARNINGS: It's Kylo Ren. I'll update if he does anything particularly awful.
[OPEN TO CUSTOMERS (AND STAFF) OF POUR DECISIONS]
[WILDCARD: Hit me!]
Feel free to hit me up on discord (cryloren#2195) or plurk (starktech) for all your edgelord plotting needs!
WHERE: Various locations around De Chima
WHEN: Following the Porter's restoration
WHAT: An emotionally stunted manchild with superpowers moping around a lot
WARNINGS: It's Kylo Ren. I'll update if he does anything particularly awful.
[OPEN TO CUSTOMERS (AND STAFF) OF POUR DECISIONS]
Neither Kylo Ren or Ben Solo had been much for drink before arriving here in this strange reality- there had always been far too much going on to allow time for this kind of indulgence- but this was far from the first time Ren had found his feet carrying him towards the bar staffed by his housemate and ally.
It felt like a safe place to go when he needed distraction- and in the aftermath of the last two weeks, Ren needed plenty of distraction.
[OPEN TO RESIDENTS AND VISITORS TO DE CHIMA GOVERNMENT HOUSING]
He usually had the good grace to keep his shirt on.
Usually.
[FOLLOWING THIS TEXT CONVERSATION; CLOSED TO RESIDENTS AND VISITORS TO DE CHIMA 001]
He had known it was foolish to engage with Leia, and the memory of his foolhardy attempt to help her through her struggles with the Force had weighed heavily on his mind ever since- but the text messages she had sent him that seemed to describe a desire for reconciliation had broken him, utterly.
So he had taken off blindly into the darkness of the early evening, only really regaining control of himself once he had staggered far enough into the woods to consider the quiet solitude privacy. His chest heaved, his heart pounded, and it wasn't rage that he felt when he thought about his mother's question, the touch of her hand and the sudden agony of her draining the life from his body- it was grief.
Everything she did that demonstrated love only served to remind him of everything he had lost-- everything he had destroyed and yet found whole again here. It made a mockery of him.
No, he hadn't been prepared to confront her. He feared he might never be.
There was only one place he felt he could go to find himself again.
And so, an hour or so later, a slightly dissheveled and underdressed Kylo Ren approached the home of the one member of his family he felt had seen enough of his true nature to make the informed decision to reject him and still welcomed him with open arms-- his grandfather. It was an easy enough matter to let himself in when no-one answered the door, and he felt certain Anakin wouldn't mind.
A few minutes later, he began to regret leaving his comm device behind on the couch at home- he had never been particularly good at waiting.
A little more accustomed to the process of buying and consuming drinks here now, he approached the bar, glancing around to check for familiar faces. It wasn't that he particularly wanted (or didn't want) company- it was more that he needed very much to get out of the endless loops his thoughts were prone to follow when left to their own devices.
[OPEN TO RESIDENTS AND VISITORS TO DE CHIMA GOVERNMENT HOUSING]
He'd been banned from another gym this week- and so, because he didn't feel like going through the hassle of finding another establishment to patronise (and eventually vandalise) Kylo Ren had taken up training in the woods surrounding the government housing to which he had never actually been officially assigned.
Training, when you were Kylo Ren, involved a lot of physical exercise- he was far from reliant on his lightsaber when it came to battle, and it was important to him to remain in peak physical condition. Particularly now, in the aftermath of the Porter's reminder of just how vulnerable he had been on arrival.
Visitors and residents of De Chima's residences could often catch sight or sound of him- an arc of red crackling light glimpsed between the trees, a sharp, violent cry as he loosed himself into the rage and fury of the Dark Side, or the more mundane but still mildly unsettling sight of the directionless force user putting himself through the paces of a more routine (if extremely demanding) workout.
He usually had the good grace to keep his shirt on.
Usually.
[FOLLOWING THIS TEXT CONVERSATION; CLOSED TO RESIDENTS AND VISITORS TO DE CHIMA 001]
He had known it was foolish to engage with Leia, and the memory of his foolhardy attempt to help her through her struggles with the Force had weighed heavily on his mind ever since- but the text messages she had sent him that seemed to describe a desire for reconciliation had broken him, utterly.
So he had taken off blindly into the darkness of the early evening, only really regaining control of himself once he had staggered far enough into the woods to consider the quiet solitude privacy. His chest heaved, his heart pounded, and it wasn't rage that he felt when he thought about his mother's question, the touch of her hand and the sudden agony of her draining the life from his body- it was grief.
Everything she did that demonstrated love only served to remind him of everything he had lost-- everything he had destroyed and yet found whole again here. It made a mockery of him.
No, he hadn't been prepared to confront her. He feared he might never be.
There was only one place he felt he could go to find himself again.
And so, an hour or so later, a slightly dissheveled and underdressed Kylo Ren approached the home of the one member of his family he felt had seen enough of his true nature to make the informed decision to reject him and still welcomed him with open arms-- his grandfather. It was an easy enough matter to let himself in when no-one answered the door, and he felt certain Anakin wouldn't mind.
A few minutes later, he began to regret leaving his comm device behind on the couch at home- he had never been particularly good at waiting.
[WILDCARD: Hit me!]
Feel free to hit me up on discord (cryloren#2195) or plurk (starktech) for all your edgelord plotting needs!
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"Thank you. For reminding me."
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"Neither of us are, here."
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"He said I was important to him because of that." It still didn't make sense to him.
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"I hope you're able to sleep as well."
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"No-one has ever told you you are a good man, have they?" he murmured. "You are terrible, honestly. But you are good. To me."
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Adequate.
"You would be the first," he admitted quietly, pressing a kiss against Ren's shoulder.
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You don't have to be afraid, he wanted to add - but he didn't want Hux to think he thought him weak or vulnerable. So instead, he wrapped his arm around him and pulled him close.
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"I'm...glad," he said after a moment. Talking about feelings was difficult but he wanted to explore something new. He could do this even if it would mean being vulnerable. "I wanted to- I wasn't sure if it...I could help," he admitted slowly, trying to find the right words.
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