[Otabek takes dating seriously, probably too much for someone as young as he is, but he's never spent much time on personal matters so this is all new.
And intense, it's extremely intense. He's always known exactly what he wants and what he has to do to get it. Now, Yuri's, Yusuke's, and his own happiness is on the line, and he feels the pressure to make the right choices. He thought this could be a solution that would work for all three of them. A romance that included all three, together, if that was something that people could do. He'd just asked Yusuke out, planned for them all to meet in a few days, and he already had a lot he wanted to say.
But first, to see if him and Yusuke could connect if they were looking at each other in a romantic way.
He'd invited Yusuke to his apartment for breakfast (which he didn't make but ordered from his favorite cafe and spread out on a blanket in the middle of his bedroom) and he was optimistic, hopeful. He'd also gotten him a gift, wrapped up in mint green paper sitting on the floor next to Yusuke's side. When the other knocks at his door, Otabek pulls it open with a tentative smile, reaching for Yusuke's hand to rush him to his room. He promptly shuts the beddoor behind them and turns back to explain.]
My roommate might still be sleeping. I didn't want to wake her.
[ He should have asked for some time to think about this. Yusuke had been asked out or confessed to a number of times in his life, but nothing he decided to persue. He had always been busy, either with his work, or too sheltered under the thumb of his foster father to have much interest. Back home, saying no was easier, nobody really saw him for who he was until the Phantom Thieves came around, all those rejected romances were focused on was his pretty face.
Here, relationships are harder to navigate. He had gotten to know a lot of people rather quickly, and the web between them all was getting more intricate each day. Not being able to return peoples' feelings was harder than he remembered, because they knew him intimately and cared about him even after being told no, but the only person he really saw that way was dating another person, in addition to Yusuke. That was hard enough to swallow, without whatever it was that Otabek was suggesting.
Yusuke is an open person, but this is unconventional, even by his standards. It was hard enough to focus so much of himself so fully on one person, even if they did hit it off today, how was he supposed to manage two? How would that even work, logistically?
He's trying not to be nervous, trying to take things as they come. So, he isn't sure what to expect when he knocks on Otabek's door. He wasn't expecting to be dragged to his bedroom, that much was for sure, and he certainly wasn't expecting all of this. ]
This is beautiful, Otabek. You put this together in a day?
[ He sits when prompted, his legs folding neatly underneath him while he tucks his hair behind his ear. The skater can turn on the charm, it seems. If Yusuke's almost shy smile is anything to go by, it's working. ]
[Otabek nods, sitting across from Yusuke on the floor. There's small boxes of food, plates, and a drink holder with four drinks tucked inside.]
I didn't make it. I'm afraid I'm not much of cook, though I'm willing to learn.
[He lifts the drink holder and sets it closer.]
This is from my favorite cafe. There is a chai tea, hot chocolate, and orange juice. I didn't know what you would like and wanted to give you options.
[His room is bare, not much more than the bed, his clothes, and the blanket spread out in the middle of the floor with the food on it. Otabek hasn't had the money to fill it up, but he doesn't mind that. He's saving for something bigger.]
The package, it's for you. I thought you might like a gift.
[A memento, of sorts. One that he hopes Yusuke will see the humor in and maybe think of their meeting as a fond event.]
Neither am I. Akira tried teaching me how to make curry, once, it was a disaster. I need much more practice.
[ He considers his options while he talks, eventually reaching for the chai and taking a warm, slow sip. Whether he made it all or not, it was still very thoughtful, and Yusuke can more than appreciate that. The smile pulling at his lips doesn't fade, it only grows curious as his attention is pulled to the mint green package. Long, steady fingers pull back the paper with care, Yusuke isn't one to make a mess in his own home, much less someone else's. ]
You really didn't have to go through all this trouble over me.
[ His nerves mean an insistance on modesty, but it cracks when the paper is pulled back enough to reveal the portrait in full. That smile bursts wide open, with a laugh that has him throwing his head back. ]
Really? Again with the ice cream?
[ Yusuke gives it a long, fond look, and sets down his tea so that he can angle the painting in such a way that he see both it and Otabek at the same time. He holds his fingers up in front of his face, as if sketching something of his own I side his head, until he seems satisfied. ]
[Otabek follows suit, picking up a drink and taking a sip. His head cants to the side as he watches Yusuke open the gift, brows lifting in pleasure at the response he gets - it's nice, seeing the way he smiles and the laugh that's genuine. Otabek enjoys being the reason that people are happy, soaks up their displays of joy.]
I knew you liked art and thought a painting would fit. The ice cream caught my eye.
[He doesn't know what Yusuke is doing with his hands, but a small smile of his own curves his mouth, Otabek leaning in as if he's telling a secret.]
You must wait to find out.
[Reaching for a box, he opens it and picks a pastry for himself, setting it on his plate. He taps a few buttons on his phone, turning on some music to play softly in the background.]
I thought we could play a game while we sit. I ask a question and answer it. You respond then do the same.
I can give it another try, if you watch and make sure I don't burn myself.
[ Leaning in is changing the composition of the frame! But...he doesn't mind. That little smile catches his eye, and Yusuke lets out a little huff of air, half amused, half still nervous. After a moment of just stupidly staring, he starts making himself a plate - some sausages, a croissant, some chopped fruit - and happily pops a piece of melon into his mouth as he thinks. ]
Okay. My favorite place is in Tokyo. It is a coffee shop called Leblanc that Akira and Futaba's guardian owns. I left my mother's portrait there for safekeeping. My favorite place here is the park downtown. It's peaceful, until people start practicing their powers, and then it's fascinating. And yours?
We should have Yura there, as well. He knows more about cooking than I do.
[Otabek decides, at that little huff, that this is going to go well. He'd had his reservations, nerves ticking up the night before, but things are going smoothly. Besides, Yusuke is sweet when he's not upset with him.]
Tokyo is a lovely place. Mine is Kazakhstan, my home. I had only recently returned before arriving in Cape Canaveral. Here, I like the ice rink and the park where we met. It's quiet there.
[He takes another drink, fiddling with his muffin.]
Your favorite place is all of Kazakhstan? You can't say that, any more than I can say all of Japan! You're cheating already.
[ Yusuke gives him a teasing grin, fingers wrapping around the still warm cup of tea again and bringing it to his lips long enough for Otabek to answer for real, if inclined. ]
[Settling into his new apartment had been easy and that was all thanks to Laurie. She was friendly and that made the transition simple, comfortable. Otabek had slowly begun to spend more and more time there, less at the place issued to him by the government. Partly because he was happier in Heropa - lot of that had to do with the friends he had and was making there. Laurie was one of them.
It's late, closer to midnight and grandpa Otabek should have gone to his room already since he was an early to bed and early to rise kind of person but there was some stuff on his mind. He needed to talk about. He sets the book in his hands down, glancing over at Laurie who is at the other end of the couch.]
I haven't asked yet, but we're friends aren't we?
[They were getting to know each other still and he knew roommates didn't automatically mean friends, but he had to ask.]
The kind of friends that open up and tell each other private matters.
[ Laurie's working through some last-minute marketing work, comparing and editing blurbs that are all grouped together in a stack of paper. She got her legs curled under her and the end of her pen in the mouth when the silence it broken, and she almost jumps at the sudden noise, mild as it is. ]
S-sure. I mean, yes. [ She's still a little bad at determining closeness and when people cross those lines, but nobody's scrutinizing that right now. Otabek obviously has something he wants to say, if he's brought it up. Laurie unfolds herself to better face him, leaning forward for a moment to set her work down on the coffee table. ] I didn't mean to sound hesitant.
It's alright. I didn't phrase it correctly. We're roommates but I would like us to be friends.
[He didn't have that many friends. Yuri, yes. There were others but it was a slow process and that was probably more his fault than anyone else's. If him and Laurie could be friends, it would make him happy, and he'd put in the effort needed to make that happen.]
I wanted to talk to someone about dating. Someone that I trust to tell me the truth.
[Otabek hasn't known her for very long but she didn't appear to be dishonest, at least he didn't think she would be.]
[ It's a note of slight surprise. She wouldn't assume she comes off as a person who knows much about that, but then... Otabek's not one of those who's watched her dating history here fail to flower anything substantial. That's not really important, though, is it? He's asking for honest opinion, which she can probably give easily.
She's practical now, for all that she lacks practical use for her measured reasoning when it comes to others. ]
Well, I'll do my best. Hopefully I'm up to scratch.
[Otabek sits up a little straighter, only to lean back again. His hands fidget in his lap - an uncharacteristic display of nerves. There was a lot on his mind that he wanted to say but he didn't know where to start.]
There's someone from back home, his name is Yuri. I asked him on a date and while we were out, he told me that another had confessed feelings for him.
[He looks down at his hands.]
At first, I was jealous. I couldn't demand that Yuri choose me when we've only just begun. I wanted that, but it wouldn't be right. He needs time to decide and.. [A pause.] I only want him to pick me if that's what he truly wants.
Someone suggested that we all date. The three of us date each other, together.
I want to try that but I find myself confused about how to feel about it.
Wow. That's... [ Way more complicated that she'd have guessed. A rapid development. How do people even get into these situations? ] That's something.
[ She takes a deep breath and shakes her head slightly, as if to shake off her obvious surprise at the unconventional situation that Otabek found himself in. ]
Not that I'm-- That's not dreadful or anything, it's just... It's understandable that you'd have reservations, and for somebody to suggest that you form a threesome-type-thing is a bit... I don't know. I'd find that dismissive. It may not be a solution that validates your needs or acknowledges your feelings, you know?
[ Not that she want to dismiss that suggestion entirely. Otabek's said that he finds himself willing to try it, at least for the most part. That's as relevant as any other feeling he may have on the matter. ]
[It was something - something Otabek needed a lot more time to think about. He couldn't tell how he felt, though he was trying to work it out, because he's never had one relationship with one person, let alone a relationship with two people at the same time.]
I didn't think of it that way. [He needed to matter, to them both, or it wouldn't work.] I've never dated anyone. I was always so busy back home.
I find it difficult to express myself, when it comes to personal matters. I've always been reserved.
[Yusuke. They could talk about him.]
He's passionate. Smart. I like him, too. I like them both. I think, if given time, I could feel more than that for them.. at the same time. My heart is not small, there is room. But I wonder if they could have space for two.
It's not wrong, if they don't, but it has to be possible for this to work. I want to be loved, just as much.
[ Laurie turns it over in her mind while he speaks. She's suddenly caught in the middle as he may be. She doesn't want to dismiss the idea, to tell him to give up on something that might work, but... She's also somebody who needs absolute assurance. The room for doubt that Otabek's leaving for himself? That would drive her bonkers.
So, what does she say? ]
I want that, too.
I think aspect of an arrangement like this would make me crazy, but I don't know if it's fair for me to say that. I can't say I wouldn't take the chance. Nothing else has worked so far.
And, you know, all we've got are chances. Nothing's ever assured.
[ She's gone soft and quiet, eyes directed down towards her knees. She's different and her circumstances are different, but if she could feel wanted again, even if faced with probably-inevitable fallout, she'd probably be suckered in easy as pie. ]
I think the big thing is just communicating, right? If it doesn't work out... Well, stuff like that happens all the time. I guess it's no big deal in the end.
[Otabek had already discussed, briefly, his thoughts about dating Yusuke as well. When he'd made the suggestion, it had been an idea implanted in passing, and he hadn't had much time to think about it. About what he wanted. As important as it was to make Yuri happy and to give him time to see how he felt, he couldn't negate his own feelings or Yusuke's. They had to all matter.
Now, with a date with both boys under his belt and plenty of time to think about it all, he texts them both asking them to meet him at his apartment in Heropa. Otabek tells them to bring an over night bag and he would take care of the rest. He sends another message, a little later, asking them to be there around nine.
He used some of his savings for the night, but thought it was well worth it. When they get there, he greets each of them in turn, taking their bags to lead them down the hall. Otabek's room has been transformed again, though this time it's set up for a three-person date??. Their stuff is placed in a corner, bed shoved to one side and the floor is covered in blankets and pillows. He's made it so that they can get comfortable on the floor and, after they've had their conversation and it goes well, they can order food and stay as long as they want.
Sitting, he puts a pillow in his lap and puts his hands over it. He's already in his pajamas, a tank top and sweats that look like they're knit.]
I wanted to talk and thought we should get comfortable first. I've thought a lot about this.
[ Bring an overnight bag, and he'll take care of the rest, hmm? Otabek is always prepared, it seems. It's a trait that Yusuke wishes he had, but having the support and resources to do anything but scrape by moment to moment, physically or emotionally, is still an adjustment.
He has time to absorb, now. Time to think about what he wants, even though he's busier now than he has ever been, keeping more secrets and protecting more people, this world's greatest gift to him was a new sense of space and time. New people, new ideas, new experiences, all somehow familiar, but dramatically different at the same time, like unexpected splashes of color thrown onto an image he thought he knew. Whatever this is, between he and Yuri, he and Otabek, even between the two skaters...it's strange. Even Yusuke in all of his disinterest in what most people think of him can tell that this is strange, but it's exciting. He knows what he wants, and he doesn't second guess that desire. Only that it would really work.
Yusuke packs his bag and picks up Yuri, making sure they are on time, if not a few minutes early. He gives his bag away with a kiss on the cheek and a warning to Otabek to be careful, because of course his sketchbooks are in there, and one of them could be very dangerous if mishandled! But they have enough to talk about right now, that could wait, at least after they get comfortable. He sits down on a pillow and pulls a cozy looking blanket onto his lap, sitting close enough to knock their knees together, but not intimately close. They'll see how this goes... ]
As have I. To be honest, I am not sure where to start.
[Thank goodness Yusuke was there to keep Yuri on time. He might have spent forever in front of his closet trying to decide on just the right clothes and pajamas to bring over. Why he thought he needed two changes of clothes in addition to a set of PJs was anyone's guess (what if he changed his mind about what to wear!!), and it's probably for the best that Yusuke missed the time he took packing up his hair and skin care products. (There are a lot.)
When they make it to Otabek's house, Yuri stands back with a look somewhere between surprised and impressed while the Yusuke passes over his bag and that quick kiss. He tosses his own pack into the corner much more carelessly and kisses Otabek's other cheek before flopping down on the nearest unoccupied pillow.]
Is there really a lot to talk about when you greeted him with a kiss already? It looks like you're already okay with it.
[Otabek glances at them both. Choosing the best place to start was difficult when he wasn't sure what needed to be said. He would just.. try.]
I don't know if it's that simple. I want it to be, but there are three of us.
[Which might be the place to begin.]
I've never been in a relationship with anyone, let alone two. I think we should say what we want and how we feel about it. [He'd thought about that, talked to Laurie and Viktor, which helped.] There are things I know we're all wondering.
Are we all three dating each other, as a unit or should it be separate? Will everyone date other people or is it just us?
[His eyes flick to Yusuke.]
You already have intense feelings for Yuri. Is there room for me?
Being okay with it in theory, I think, is different from making it work. We all have to agree on a number of things.
[ Like everything Otabek just said. The three of them were on the same page as far as not having any experience with relationships, even in simpler forms than this. As potentially uncomfortable as these questions are, he can't help but smile, shifting to get comfortable as Otabek seemingly plucks them right from the forefront of Yusuke's mind. When addressed directly, he spends a brief moment in silence, chewing on his tongue, glancing to Yuri and then back. ]
I do, but there is room for you. [ He pauses, just to make sure he is measuring out his words with care. Yusuke is free with his feelings, but he doesn't say things or do things just to placate people, or because it's what he's supposed to say. He doesn't want to say anything that he's not completely sure of, or anything that could be misinterpreted. He is open, but not careless. There are difficult feelings to be addressed before they go any further. ] I really like you. If it were just the two of us, that would be enough to start on, but my feelings for Yuri are stronger, and I have had them for longer. Maybe you and I can get there, and maybe we cannot. I want to try, but my fear lies in the fact that we will not know until we get there.
[Yuri frowns mildly and sits up a little, propping himself up on his elbows.]
What if we don't know what we want? [He'd never expected to want to be in a relationship in the first place, much less to know what he might want out of one. Or two. Was this two??] I mean...I know I like both of you. And I'm— I'm really glad you're both okay with letting me figure this out...but if I knew what I wanted yet then we wouldn't be here at all, would we?
[Otabek listens to them both. What Yusuke says, Otabek needs to hear. He'd already known that, and in the reverse, the situation was the same. He felt more for Yuri because they'd known each other longer, he'd developed feelings first. That didn't mean that he couldn't feel the same, just that it would take time.]
Then that's all that matters.
[If they were going to try this, everyone had to believe, for now, that they could be capable of loving two people. That might not end up being the case, but that was for another day.]
No, we wouldn't. I don't think it's fair to make assumptions about the future. None of know how we will feel in a day, week, or months from now. We might agree to this and it doesn't work out at all. Or it could. [Or some other variation. He didn't know what was going to happen.] I think we all have to agree to go in open and willing to try.
And understand that what we think or feel now could change.
[Which leads him into the rest, possibly opening them up to disagreement, but he had to say it.]
I don't want us to date anyone else, not while we're trying this.
[ Yusuke keeps his eyes on Yuri while he speaks. He seems...hesitant, perhaps? Of course, he has a hundred good reasons to be, Yusuke is still surprised at himself for being so open to this as a possibility. He leans over towards him, offering his hand, and wondering briefly if that gesture would even be okay. But it has to be, if it really is the three of them ]
You are right, we might not be. Otabek and I might not have reached out to each other, either, which would have been a shame. But that doesn't matter, because this is where we are now. Trying to see if we all want the same thing, or not.
[ It's serious, just like Otabek's concern is serious, but he has to laugh a little. ]
Anyone else? No need to worry on my end, the two of you are more than enough.
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maskormenacelogs2017-07-30 10:55 pm
closed to yusuke - 7/31
And intense, it's extremely intense. He's always known exactly what he wants and what he has to do to get it. Now, Yuri's, Yusuke's, and his own happiness is on the line, and he feels the pressure to make the right choices. He thought this could be a solution that would work for all three of them. A romance that included all three, together, if that was something that people could do. He'd just asked Yusuke out, planned for them all to meet in a few days, and he already had a lot he wanted to say.
But first, to see if him and Yusuke could connect if they were looking at each other in a romantic way.
He'd invited Yusuke to his apartment for breakfast (which he didn't make but ordered from his favorite cafe and spread out on a blanket in the middle of his bedroom) and he was optimistic, hopeful. He'd also gotten him a gift, wrapped up in mint green paper sitting on the floor next to Yusuke's side. When the other knocks at his door, Otabek pulls it open with a tentative smile, reaching for Yusuke's hand to rush him to his room. He promptly shuts the beddoor behind them and turns back to explain.]
My roommate might still be sleeping. I didn't want to wake her.
[He's all dressed up for the date, too.]
Sit. Please.
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Here, relationships are harder to navigate. He had gotten to know a lot of people rather quickly, and the web between them all was getting more intricate each day. Not being able to return peoples' feelings was harder than he remembered, because they knew him intimately and cared about him even after being told no, but the only person he really saw that way was dating another person, in addition to Yusuke. That was hard enough to swallow, without whatever it was that Otabek was suggesting.
Yusuke is an open person, but this is unconventional, even by his standards. It was hard enough to focus so much of himself so fully on one person, even if they did hit it off today, how was he supposed to manage two? How would that even work, logistically?
He's trying not to be nervous, trying to take things as they come. So, he isn't sure what to expect when he knocks on Otabek's door. He wasn't expecting to be dragged to his bedroom, that much was for sure, and he certainly wasn't expecting all of this. ]
This is beautiful, Otabek. You put this together in a day?
[ He sits when prompted, his legs folding neatly underneath him while he tucks his hair behind his ear. The skater can turn on the charm, it seems. If Yusuke's almost shy smile is anything to go by, it's working. ]
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I didn't make it. I'm afraid I'm not much of cook, though I'm willing to learn.
[He lifts the drink holder and sets it closer.]
This is from my favorite cafe. There is a chai tea, hot chocolate, and orange juice. I didn't know what you would like and wanted to give you options.
[His room is bare, not much more than the bed, his clothes, and the blanket spread out in the middle of the floor with the food on it. Otabek hasn't had the money to fill it up, but he doesn't mind that. He's saving for something bigger.]
The package, it's for you. I thought you might like a gift.
[A memento, of sorts. One that he hopes Yusuke will see the humor in and maybe think of their meeting as a fond event.]
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[ He considers his options while he talks, eventually reaching for the chai and taking a warm, slow sip. Whether he made it all or not, it was still very thoughtful, and Yusuke can more than appreciate that. The smile pulling at his lips doesn't fade, it only grows curious as his attention is pulled to the mint green package. Long, steady fingers pull back the paper with care, Yusuke isn't one to make a mess in his own home, much less someone else's. ]
You really didn't have to go through all this trouble over me.
[ His nerves mean an insistance on modesty, but it cracks when the paper is pulled back enough to reveal the portrait in full. That smile bursts wide open, with a laugh that has him throwing his head back. ]
Really? Again with the ice cream?
[ Yusuke gives it a long, fond look, and sets down his tea so that he can angle the painting in such a way that he see both it and Otabek at the same time. He holds his fingers up in front of his face, as if sketching something of his own I side his head, until he seems satisfied. ]
I love it. Thank you. Any more surprises?
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[Otabek follows suit, picking up a drink and taking a sip. His head cants to the side as he watches Yusuke open the gift, brows lifting in pleasure at the response he gets - it's nice, seeing the way he smiles and the laugh that's genuine. Otabek enjoys being the reason that people are happy, soaks up their displays of joy.]
I knew you liked art and thought a painting would fit. The ice cream caught my eye.
[He doesn't know what Yusuke is doing with his hands, but a small smile of his own curves his mouth, Otabek leaning in as if he's telling a secret.]
You must wait to find out.
[Reaching for a box, he opens it and picks a pastry for himself, setting it on his plate. He taps a few buttons on his phone, turning on some music to play softly in the background.]
I thought we could play a game while we sit. I ask a question and answer it. You respond then do the same.
[A beat.]
What is your favorite place?
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[ Leaning in is changing the composition of the frame! But...he doesn't mind. That little smile catches his eye, and Yusuke lets out a little huff of air, half amused, half still nervous. After a moment of just stupidly staring, he starts making himself a plate - some sausages, a croissant, some chopped fruit - and happily pops a piece of melon into his mouth as he thinks. ]
Okay. My favorite place is in Tokyo. It is a coffee shop called Leblanc that Akira and Futaba's guardian owns. I left my mother's portrait there for safekeeping. My favorite place here is the park downtown. It's peaceful, until people start practicing their powers, and then it's fascinating. And yours?
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[Otabek decides, at that little huff, that this is going to go well. He'd had his reservations, nerves ticking up the night before, but things are going smoothly. Besides, Yusuke is sweet when he's not upset with him.]
Tokyo is a lovely place. Mine is Kazakhstan, my home. I had only recently returned before arriving in Cape Canaveral. Here, I like the ice rink and the park where we met. It's quiet there.
[He takes another drink, fiddling with his muffin.]
Your turn.
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[ Yusuke gives him a teasing grin, fingers wrapping around the still warm cup of tea again and bringing it to his lips long enough for Otabek to answer for real, if inclined. ]
What makes you angrier than anything?
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[Otabek enjoyed many of the places where he'd grown up, but that one specifically.]
When people hurt those I care about. It makes me irrational. You?
[His next question comes easily.]
What is your least favorite thing to do?
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closed to laurie - 8/1
It's late, closer to midnight and
grandpaOtabek should have gone to his room already since he was an early to bed and early to rise kind of person but there was some stuff on his mind. He needed to talk about. He sets the book in his hands down, glancing over at Laurie who is at the other end of the couch.]I haven't asked yet, but we're friends aren't we?
[They were getting to know each other still and he knew roommates didn't automatically mean friends, but he had to ask.]
The kind of friends that open up and tell each other private matters.
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S-sure. I mean, yes. [ She's still a little bad at determining closeness and when people cross those lines, but nobody's scrutinizing that right now. Otabek obviously has something he wants to say, if he's brought it up. Laurie unfolds herself to better face him, leaning forward for a moment to set her work down on the coffee table. ] I didn't mean to sound hesitant.
What's up?
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[He didn't have that many friends. Yuri, yes. There were others but it was a slow process and that was probably more his fault than anyone else's. If him and Laurie could be friends, it would make him happy, and he'd put in the effort needed to make that happen.]
I wanted to talk to someone about dating. Someone that I trust to tell me the truth.
[Otabek hasn't known her for very long but she didn't appear to be dishonest, at least he didn't think she would be.]
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[ It's a note of slight surprise. She wouldn't assume she comes off as a person who knows much about that, but then... Otabek's not one of those who's watched her dating history here fail to flower anything substantial. That's not really important, though, is it? He's asking for honest opinion, which she can probably give easily.
She's practical now, for all that she lacks practical use for her measured reasoning when it comes to others. ]
Well, I'll do my best. Hopefully I'm up to scratch.
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There's someone from back home, his name is Yuri. I asked him on a date and while we were out, he told me that another had confessed feelings for him.
[He looks down at his hands.]
At first, I was jealous. I couldn't demand that Yuri choose me when we've only just begun. I wanted that, but it wouldn't be right. He needs time to decide and.. [A pause.] I only want him to pick me if that's what he truly wants.
Someone suggested that we all date. The three of us date each other, together.
I want to try that but I find myself confused about how to feel about it.
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[ She takes a deep breath and shakes her head slightly, as if to shake off her obvious surprise at the unconventional situation that Otabek found himself in. ]
Not that I'm-- That's not dreadful or anything, it's just... It's understandable that you'd have reservations, and for somebody to suggest that you form a threesome-type-thing is a bit... I don't know. I'd find that dismissive. It may not be a solution that validates your needs or acknowledges your feelings, you know?
[ Not that she want to dismiss that suggestion entirely. Otabek's said that he finds himself willing to try it, at least for the most part. That's as relevant as any other feeling he may have on the matter. ]
How to do you feel about the third party?
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I didn't think of it that way. [He needed to matter, to them both, or it wouldn't work.] I've never dated anyone. I was always so busy back home.
I find it difficult to express myself, when it comes to personal matters. I've always been reserved.
[Yusuke. They could talk about him.]
He's passionate. Smart. I like him, too. I like them both. I think, if given time, I could feel more than that for them.. at the same time. My heart is not small, there is room. But I wonder if they could have space for two.
It's not wrong, if they don't, but it has to be possible for this to work. I want to be loved, just as much.
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So, what does she say? ]
I want that, too.
I think aspect of an arrangement like this would make me crazy, but I don't know if it's fair for me to say that. I can't say I wouldn't take the chance. Nothing else has worked so far.
And, you know, all we've got are chances. Nothing's ever assured.
[ She's gone soft and quiet, eyes directed down towards her knees. She's different and her circumstances are different, but if she could feel wanted again, even if faced with probably-inevitable fallout, she'd probably be suckered in easy as pie. ]
I think the big thing is just communicating, right? If it doesn't work out... Well, stuff like that happens all the time. I guess it's no big deal in the end.
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closed to yusuke and yuri - 8/7
Now, with a date with both boys under his belt and plenty of time to think about it all, he texts them both asking them to meet him at his apartment in Heropa. Otabek tells them to bring an over night bag and he would take care of the rest. He sends another message, a little later, asking them to be there around nine.
He used some of his savings for the night, but thought it was well worth it. When they get there, he greets each of them in turn, taking their bags to lead them down the hall. Otabek's room has been transformed again, though this time it's set up for a three-person date??. Their stuff is placed in a corner, bed shoved to one side and the floor is covered in blankets and pillows. He's made it so that they can get comfortable on the floor and, after they've had their conversation and it goes well, they can order food and stay as long as they want.
Sitting, he puts a pillow in his lap and puts his hands over it. He's already in his pajamas, a tank top and sweats that look like they're knit.]
I wanted to talk and thought we should get comfortable first. I've thought a lot about this.
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He has time to absorb, now. Time to think about what he wants, even though he's busier now than he has ever been, keeping more secrets and protecting more people, this world's greatest gift to him was a new sense of space and time. New people, new ideas, new experiences, all somehow familiar, but dramatically different at the same time, like unexpected splashes of color thrown onto an image he thought he knew. Whatever this is, between he and Yuri, he and Otabek, even between the two skaters...it's strange. Even Yusuke in all of his disinterest in what most people think of him can tell that this is strange, but it's exciting. He knows what he wants, and he doesn't second guess that desire. Only that it would really work.
Yusuke packs his bag and picks up Yuri, making sure they are on time, if not a few minutes early. He gives his bag away with a kiss on the cheek and a warning to Otabek to be careful, because of course his sketchbooks are in there, and one of them could be very dangerous if mishandled! But they have enough to talk about right now, that could wait, at least after they get comfortable. He sits down on a pillow and pulls a cozy looking blanket onto his lap, sitting close enough to knock their knees together, but not intimately close. They'll see how this goes... ]
As have I. To be honest, I am not sure where to start.
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When they make it to Otabek's house, Yuri stands back with a look somewhere between surprised and impressed while the Yusuke passes over his bag and that quick kiss. He tosses his own pack into the corner much more carelessly and kisses Otabek's other cheek before flopping down on the nearest unoccupied pillow.]
Is there really a lot to talk about when you greeted him with a kiss already? It looks like you're already okay with it.
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I don't know if it's that simple. I want it to be, but there are three of us.
[Which might be the place to begin.]
I've never been in a relationship with anyone, let alone two. I think we should say what we want and how we feel about it. [He'd thought about that, talked to Laurie and Viktor, which helped.] There are things I know we're all wondering.
Are we all three dating each other, as a unit or should it be separate? Will everyone date other people or is it just us?
[His eyes flick to Yusuke.]
You already have intense feelings for Yuri. Is there room for me?
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[ Like everything Otabek just said. The three of them were on the same page as far as not having any experience with relationships, even in simpler forms than this. As potentially uncomfortable as these questions are, he can't help but smile, shifting to get comfortable as Otabek seemingly plucks them right from the forefront of Yusuke's mind. When addressed directly, he spends a brief moment in silence, chewing on his tongue, glancing to Yuri and then back. ]
I do, but there is room for you. [ He pauses, just to make sure he is measuring out his words with care. Yusuke is free with his feelings, but he doesn't say things or do things just to placate people, or because it's what he's supposed to say. He doesn't want to say anything that he's not completely sure of, or anything that could be misinterpreted. He is open, but not careless. There are difficult feelings to be addressed before they go any further. ] I really like you. If it were just the two of us, that would be enough to start on, but my feelings for Yuri are stronger, and I have had them for longer. Maybe you and I can get there, and maybe we cannot. I want to try, but my fear lies in the fact that we will not know until we get there.
[ An exhale. Has he been holding his breath? ]
If we get there.
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What if we don't know what we want? [He'd never expected to want to be in a relationship in the first place, much less to know what he might want out of one. Or two. Was this two??] I mean...I know I like both of you. And I'm— I'm really glad you're both okay with letting me figure this out...but if I knew what I wanted yet then we wouldn't be here at all, would we?
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Then that's all that matters.
[If they were going to try this, everyone had to believe, for now, that they could be capable of loving two people. That might not end up being the case, but that was for another day.]
No, we wouldn't. I don't think it's fair to make assumptions about the future. None of know how we will feel in a day, week, or months from now. We might agree to this and it doesn't work out at all. Or it could. [Or some other variation. He didn't know what was going to happen.] I think we all have to agree to go in open and willing to try.
And understand that what we think or feel now could change.
[Which leads him into the rest, possibly opening them up to disagreement, but he had to say it.]
I don't want us to date anyone else, not while we're trying this.
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You are right, we might not be. Otabek and I might not have reached out to each other, either, which would have been a shame. But that doesn't matter, because this is where we are now. Trying to see if we all want the same thing, or not.
[ It's serious, just like Otabek's concern is serious, but he has to laugh a little. ]
Anyone else? No need to worry on my end, the two of you are more than enough.
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