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WHO: Piper + Trickster
WHERE: The Frisky Nickel Bar in Heropa
WHEN: 7/18
WHAT: Piper needs a drink.
WARNINGS: Likely discussions of homophobia

[ After spending a significant portion of his morning having a difficult phone conversation, Piper decides that's nearly enough compassion for other people for one day, and there was nothing he had to do this afternoon that couldn't wait until after he'd recharged a little. He knows the Frisky Nickel won't be open for awhile yet, but he figures, even if James isn't around, he knows how to let himself in, and it's not like James would mind if he helps himself to a drink, right? It's not like James has never broken into anything of Piper's before.

It winds up ultimately a moot point, as the door is unlocked and the (mostly non-neon) lights are on, illuminating the empty bar. Or almost empty, as Piper spots what he hopes is James' legs sticking out from underneath the skeeball machine. ]

...James?

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[ It is, in fact, his legs. There's a toolbox nearby, and a faintly ominous whirring sound coming from the back of the machine, and something bangs from beneath it. ]

James is in skeeball hell, please— [ clang, grunt ] —leave a message after the beep.

[ James doesn't beep. ]

...Are skeeball machines supposed to make that noise?

[ He's coming closer to investigate, peering down into the depths of Skeeball Hell. ]

Not if they're not haunted.

[ With another quiet grunt, James pulls himself out from under the machine, sleeves of his orange shirt rolled up to his elbows. There's grease on one cheekbone, and some of his hair looks faintly singed.

He extends a hand. ]

Help me up?

Should I find you an exorcist?

[ He laughs as he reaches down to take James' hand, helping pull him up to his feet. But as he does, there's an unsettling moment where he catches himself realizing that James looks...attractive like this? Which is so startling, he almost drops him. ]

Nah, it's cool, I keep my holy water in the Grey Goose bottle behind the counter.

[ He grins, wiping his palms off on his jeans. ]

To what do I owe the pleasure?

[ It takes him a second to respond, too busy trying to repress that whatever that was just now ever happened. ]

Huh? Oh. Nothing, just... It's been a weird day. Thought I could use a drink somewhere without other people around.

I'm so glad I don't count as "other people," Pipes, you always flatter me.

[ He claps Piper on the back, striding over to the bar. ]

What can I getcha?

Got anything that'll rinse out the taste of me putting my foot in my mouth?

[ He sits at the bar, reaching over it to steal a maraschino cherry out of the garnish tray. ]

No, but I can mix you something that'll make you forget you ever did.

God, it's probably too early in the day for this question, but what do you have in mind?

[ He's already starting to put something together. It looks complicated. And... bad? ]

I call it a Muppets Take Manhattan!

[ He watches the ingredients with slowly dawning horror. ] ...Okay, I get the Manhattan part, but what're the Muppets in this?

You've heard of a Mind Eraser, right?

Oh, that explains the Kahlua.

Yes! Right, so, you know the plot of Muppets Take Manhattan, yeah?

[ He says, as if that's a thing everyone should know offhand. ]

Edited 2017-08-05 05:22 (UTC)

That's... the one where they write a musical?

[ Look, Piper's been James' friend for way too long to not have seen all of the Muppet movies. Also, the Muppet movies have really solid soundtracks. ]

It's the one where Kermit gets amnesia.

[ And he grins like he's more proud of himself than he's ever been. ]

[ It takes him a second to make the connection, and then he rolls his eyes and snorts, unable to keep from grinning. ]

Okay, that's admittedly pretty good. I mean, awful, but really good. Now let's see how it tastes.

[ James laughs, just happy that Piper's actually playing along with this stupidity, and slides the glass across the counter to him. He leans forward on his elbows, an anticipatory gleam in his eye. ]

Bottoms up!

[ He eyes the drink warily, before taking a sip. He coughs as he swallows it down. ]

Okay, that's definitely—hoo. It's definitely strong. But surprisingly not terrible?

[ Against his better judgement, he takes another sip. ]

Really? No foolin'? It's my first go at it!

Well, it could be a lot worse. It definitely tastes like two different drinks had a trashy one night stand in my mouth, though.

In a good way?

Hmm... [ He considers this for a second. ] In a not-bad way?

So like, you think they'd call each other? Text?

Texting, definitely. Maybe another couple of ill-advised hookups.

Well, I've gotten worse reviews than that!

[ Piper takes another drink, and it goes down smoother now that he's almost used to the taste.
He raises an eyebrow and grins over the rim of the glass. ]

For yourself, or your bartending skills?

[ James' eyebrows raise a little, and then he chuckles, shaking his head. ]

Now you know damn well it's both.

I wish I could say you don't seem the kind of guy who goes for ill-advised hookups, but...

[ He gestures at James with his glass before taking yet another sip. Whether this is a comment on James' sexual promiscuity or just his ill-advised life choices in general is anybody's guess. ]

Well.

What's that supposed to mean, huh?

[ He doesn't seem offended, just leaning casually with his elbows braced on the bar. If anything,
he thinks it's funny. ]

[ He laughs, rolling his eyes and leaning back on the barstool a little. ]

You know Mick told me you hooked up with Harley Quinn, right?

[ At least he has the decency to blush about it. ]

That was a several night stand.

[ God, blushing, really? There's that drop of his stomach as he realizes that yeah, James is attractive. More than just that, he is Attracted to James.

He's going to blame this on the day drinking later. ]

That sounds even more ill-advised.

You ever played the sexy version of Hungry Hungry Hippos?

How.

You askin' for a demonstration?

Or an explanation, at least.

It involves a lot of—

[ He clears his throat delicately, and, with his hand cupped like he's about to share a secret (even though they're alone in the bar), he stage whispers: ]

Gobbling balls.

Oh my god.

[ He bursts into laughter, leaning back on the bar stool. ]

I should've seen that coming.

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