[Ken continues walking even after Kaneda stops, so he ends up a couple steps in front of him, standing without turning to face him. But his shoulders are hunched and his hands are clenched into fists, so seeing his face may not be necessary to figuring out his expression.
He feels the dam inside him, damaged from all the hits it took from the past few weeks, start to quake, straining against the pressure inside. He had held on for so long. He wasn't trying to be self-sacrificial; he genuinely believed that this was for the best. But there's Kaneda, trying to pull him back as usual.
Trying to keep him anchored even as he tried with all his might to let himself be swept away.]
... It's not like I wanted to leave, [he says, and the words that follow come spilling out.] It's not like I'm leaving because I want to. That house used to be where I could go and be okay, but it's not anymore.
[His voice shakes and comes out a pitch higher, his throat tightening -- no, he doesn't want to cry -- as he says what he'd been thinking for a long time now,] Even though I was there first.
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He feels the dam inside him, damaged from all the hits it took from the past few weeks, start to quake, straining against the pressure inside. He had held on for so long. He wasn't trying to be self-sacrificial; he genuinely believed that this was for the best. But there's Kaneda, trying to pull him back as usual.
Trying to keep him anchored even as he tried with all his might to let himself be swept away.]
... It's not like I wanted to leave, [he says, and the words that follow come spilling out.] It's not like I'm leaving because I want to. That house used to be where I could go and be okay, but it's not anymore.
[His voice shakes and comes out a pitch higher, his throat tightening -- no, he doesn't want to cry -- as he says what he'd been thinking for a long time now,] Even though I was there first.