"... I'm just... not used to any of you believing me, you know? As many times as I talked about Ben-" No, that isn't fair. That isn't fair of him to shove on Luther, and he tries again, clearing his throat.
"... I just. What am I supposed to say? Dave died. Hole blown into his chest like Ben's. I didn't- I came home."

He doesn't look at him. Doesn't want his pity or his judgement or anything else. Doesn't want his blame for Ben's death, or how he'd failed to help him, or anything else for that matter. He wants this conversation to be done.

"I'm surprised you even noticed I was gone. Or did you?"