“Excuse me,” and the affront is only about fifty percent feigned. She can totally commit crimes, Alfimothy Solomons. See if she can't.

There's a pause.

“It was peer pressure. I was drunk and I thought he was going to shoot me in the face and then he was like, hey baby, let's go rob a bank—he didn't say 'hey baby'. I think, I mean, I was wasted and high on not getting shot.”

That'll kickstart adrenaline in most people.

“And I said I was too drunk to do anything like that, but I was also the right amount of drunk to not want to have someone say I didn't have the stones, so,”

she makes a series of gestures with her fork that don't actually explain anything, whatsoever.

“I was thinking about it the other day. I don't know. I wanted to talk to somebody about it without getting arrested. I totally didn't get caught, though.”