maskormenacelogs | [Closed]

WHO: Anakin Skywalker & Kylo Ren.
WHERE: Kylo and Hux's house.
WHEN: After the big reveal but before a certain Jedi Master is murdered.
WHAT: Grandfather and grandson bonding, mostly, but this is about healing, hopefully, too.
WARNINGS: Might be some mention of loss of limbs/extensive burns and/or death. Nothing will be terribly graphic and if that changes, I will update.

His heart was a stone in his chest, threatening to rise up and lodge itself in his throat. He didn't blame Obi-Wan or Padmé or Ahsoka. He blamed himself. He was so very angry at what he was doomed to become - and all for what? Sidious and his wretched Empire.

Anakin reached out to Kylo Ren almost immediately, sensing that he might be one of the few that understood how miserable he felt. His grandson was also not someone he had already bothered excessively for companionship...for comfort. Maybe they both needed more of that.

He wiped at some unshed tears upon receiving an answer. Kylo was a blessing. He had to help him - and thus himself - somehow. His grandson was too damn good for the Dark Side.

But that could be dealt with later. Clothed mostly in black with a coat to match, Anakin made the trip to Kylo's home and knocked on a door for the second time today. His eyes were a chaotic mix of blue and gold - as if they couldn't decide what they wanted to be - and there were red rims around each.

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Kylo could sense Anakin's approach- he almost opened the door before he knocked on it- and he didn't need to be told what had happened. Those eyes... he'd never had his shift like that, but he'd worn that expression.

He'd had nowhere to turn. Anakin was different, here at least. Kylo was determined to be family for him, now.

Wordlessly, he reached out and drew Anakin into an embrace.

He wouldn't have known how to ask for comfort. Even with Padmé, he wasn't the best at putting his emotions into words - or his needs for that matter. But he didn't need to with Kylo, it seemed, and the tears returned with a vengeance.

"Kylo..." he shook from his head to his toes and his sobs were rising up within, looking for an escape valve. His thoughts were filled with fire and the memories of pain when his arm had been severed. There would be more of that. So much more..

Then there were glimpses of Padmé crying out for him and Leia being held firmly by him while her planet was destroyed. Anakin held onto Kylo as if he were caught in a storm and his grandson were his only anchor.

The pain, the anguish, the terror of an inescapable destiny- Kylo had nothing to give Anakin that could protect him from it. But what he could do, what he would always do, what he had always wanted to do was stand with him.
Having his Grandfather here, flesh and blood- it was a miracle, as far as Kylo was concerned- but he knew Anakin felt far from miraculous, right now.

"I know."

He wrapped his arms around him, strong and firm. He would tear the very universe apart to restore peace for his Grandfather, if it were possible- the ferocity, the sheer intensity of his love for him was practically tangible in the air.

He was wrong. He could protect him - at least the most precious part of him. Kylo's love was returned with the same ferocity - a shield of fire and spikes of phrik that refused to be dented by the world or its emotional missiles. When Anakin loved, he gave his full heart and soul. He was not someone who only felt fondness for others and now Kylo would experience the depth of it all - and the reason he had been driven mad by Padmé's fate.

"I hate... I'm angry..."

All the things a Jedi shouldn't be. His body relaxed, however, in stages and his heart slowed to a comfortable pace. He was with family. As much as it hurt, he knew it could be much worse.

"I'm going to change it while I'm here. I can't do anything about the future or our galaxy, but here, I can do something."

"You have done something," Kylo told him, his hold relaxing by degrees as he felt Anakin's pulse fall steady, the turbulence within him quieting as he focused on his resolve to dedicate his energy to the world they had found themselves in. It was a sentiment Kylo agreed with, a philosophy he too had tried to adopt, and the strength with which Anakin loved was not foreign to him- it didn't frighten or unnerve him. He recognised it in himself- something that had been twisted against him for too long.

He drew back, his grip now just a steadying, protective hold on Anakin's arms as he looked him in the eyes.

"I had nothing. And I have little to return to. But here, I have this. You have inspired me. I have friends, I have family. Because of you. Come-- come inside, by the fire. Let me get us something to drink."

"I...have?" Anakin blinked in surprise and unconcealed wonder. The color of his eyes was, by measures, turning the blue of a clear Summer sky. He could not possibly fight off the Sith within him forever, but the stars knew, he would give it his best try for as long as possible! Especially with such support.

Kylo's words touched him and he lifted his left hand to grip his forearm in return. Though he could still use some color - any color would be nice (besides the red around his eyes) - he was smiling. Weakly. But it was a genuine expression.

"You have me. You have your grandmother." he wanted so badly to say Kylo had Leia, Han and Luke, but he just didn't know how to make it right between them, "She was really worried about you, you know." he nodded and walked to the fire, glad to warm his hands and shed his coat.

Kylo knew what Anakin needed. Hot Chocolate. He'd recently discovered it himself.

"I like Padmé," he said as he made his way over to the kitchen, searching through the cabinets until he found what he needed. Good. "Very much. She is... exceptionally kind, and... strong."

He paused, putting water on the boil and summoning a couple of mugs to the counter with barely a thought, glancing back to Anakin by the fire.

"And she loves you. Very much."

He had been sticking with tea, mostly, but he had tried the latte Leia had ordered before their meeting. The Jedi were not big on sweets - for obvious reasons - so Anakin was taking his time, tasting what this world had to offer when the opportunity struck. He would love hot chocolate.

"She has always accepted me. She could have saved herself a lot of pain and ignored...what we feel." but that wasn't her nature, "I'm stupid for not trusting her." his lips twitched, "Don't make my mistake with her. You can tell her anything and she will love you. She will try to do the best for you - even if you are angry at her for it. You couldn't ask for a better grandmother, I promise."

Padmé was the sort you could curl up with, unburden your heart and feel like, for a few moments, all was well in the universe.

"I love her. And I love you." which made it all so much better and so much worse.

As far as Kylo was concerned, hot chocolate was an answer to a whole host of ills. He made them up a tall mug each and brought them over- there was something oddly soothing, he thought, about the warmth of just holding a cup of something hot and sweet.

It wouldn't fix the future. He didn't know if that was even possible. But perhaps, enough small signals of care, here in the present...

"Something happened," he prompted, offering Anakin a mug. "You don't have to tell me. We can talk about anything you like. But I am willing to listen. If you think it will help."

Anakin would agree! In the meantime, he settled before the fire, crossing his legs comfortably. The mug was accepted with a weak smile of gratitude and soon he was inhaling the sweet scent. Curiously, he took a small sip, humming at the surprisingly rich - and delicious - flavor.

He had almost forgotten what chocolate tasted like. And it did help him feel stronger.

"Obi-Wan, Ahsoka...and Padmé...told me what to expect when I return." he never imagined it being so bad, but it was, "I lose everything and everyone. Except Sidious." his voice hardened, turning cold, "I think he used Padmé's life to keep me alive."

Edited 2018-01-05 05:25 (UTC)

Kylo wasn't sure how to respond, taking a moment to sip at his own drink as he sat down. What could he do, to help Anakin face the horror that awaited him? Was there anything, that would lessen the sting?

"Did they tell you how Sidious dies?" he asked, his eyes steady on Anakin's face. Perhaps... perhaps that could offer some comfort. He wasn't sure.

"Luke mentioned I kill him." decades too late, "Knowing he makes a puppet out of me for years, knowing he's part of the reason I never see my kids..." he gritted his teeth and took another sip from the mug, "Kylo, I can do better. I'm relieved Luke saw me...me..." not Darth Vader, "at the end, but that was too damn late."

"You see your son," Kylo told him, his heart pounding. It hurt. Yes, it hurt, but he would do it. For Anakin. "Your son. Who has idolised you. And loved you, without ever having met you. But-- more than that. He sees you. Under the pain. You endure... such pain. You are surrounded by liars. But you never stop loving your family. Ever. And he sees past everything else. He sees your heart."

He paused, swallowing. Steadying himself before going on.

"Luke wasn't ready to face Sidious. Neither of you could have destroyed him alone. But he believed in you. And you didn't let him down."

[Closed]

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