Monthly Rogues Catchall: August Edition

[socialactivillain]

WHO: The Rogues + Others
WHERE: Heropa 20, and elsewhere
WHEN: The month of August
WHAT: Just rogues bein dudes. What's better than this?
WARNINGS: Puns.

(Open post for all roguenanigans.)

Comments

[catchacold]

[Rats.

Of course. What next? God forbid they'd get something actually useful that wouldn't just shit all over the place, like a car or a bike. But no, here they are. The rats.

Leonard has the urge to count them, but gives up on that quickly to just raise an eyebrow to the Piper.]

At least they fit the theme.

[socialactivillain]

[ Piper, for his part, just looks long-suffering. Stop judging him, everyone!! ]

Look, I know, okay. They didn't have anywhere else to go.

[catchacold]

As long as they stay out of my room.

[As long as everyone stays out of his room. And the dog stops trying to get him to pet him, what's up with that? At least the rats aren't looking for affection.]

Not enough space in the sewer?

[socialactivillain]

They know not to go in the house.

[ The chinchilla is a bossy little asshole, though, and probably continues to bother everyone in the house for attention, especially when he's in his ball and therefore invincible, in his own mind. ]

But anyway, they're not city rats, they're from a farm. They wouldn't know what to do in a sewer.

[catchacold]

[One of the many, many reasons Leonard leaves his room as little as possible. Also why nobody is allowed inside his room. They might have animals on them.]

Ah, of course. Country rats.

[He looks down at them, taking a step back so he can lean against the wall, one leg pulled up.]

Welcome to the city. Say no to drugs.

[socialactivillain]

[ The nearby rats squeak curiously at Len, and glance up at Piper for a translation. ]

Say no to Capitalism.

[ There is not even the slightest trace of irony in his words. ]

[catchacold]

[He looks at Piper, slowly tilting his head to the side. So many options, so little time.

Here goes.]

So I take it you're not up for a round of Monopoly?

[socialactivillain]

No.

[catchacold]

Word association then. I say a word, you make it a cause.

[Seems to be about the norm, really.]

The best thing? No one wins.

[socialactivillain]

Then let's just go ahead and skip playing altogether.

[ Two of the rats are edging closer to Len's feet, chattering to each other like each is daring the other to get closer. ]

[catchacold]

It's too bad the economy is in recess or I'd buy you a sense of humour.

[While he watches the rats, he doesn't show any sign of being eager to have them come any closer. Not that he seems appalled either, mostly neutral on the subject of rats, it'd seem.]

[socialactivillain]

I have sense of humor, it's just slightly higher caliber than cheap jabs at my sociopolitical stances.

[ Piper watches the rats too, curious to see if they're going to go closer. They look back him and chitter curiously, to which he just shrugs. ]

[catchacold]

You should relax. Ain't as if I'm a capitalist.

[He's a Zamboni driver.

He also looks at the rats, noting that they seem to be talking to Piper. Power or is everyone just going insane? Fifty-fifty.]

I promise, I won't teach your rats anything about the economy.

[socialactivillain]

They wouldn't be terribly interested anyway.

[catchacold]

Can't blame them.

[Not exactly his focus either. Len looks around the garage, finally deciding that he needs to ask:]

What animal's next?

[socialactivillain]

Ideally none, but I'm not promising anything.

[catchacold]

I'll go barricade my door.

[When did his home become a zoo?]

[socialactivillain]

[ The day Trickster moved in? ]

It's not like any of them go upstairs but Francisco and Mick's dog, anyway.

[catchacold]

[Point.]

Cisco in my bedroom. All I ever wanted.

[socialactivillain]

[ He raises an eyebrow. ]

He'll stay out if I ask him to.

[catchacold]

Don't worry about it. Never had a problem keeping anyone out of my bedroom before.

[Besides, Cisco is kind of cute.

The rodent.

Well. Both.]

[socialactivillain]

Normally people don't brag about keeping people out of their bedrooms...

[catchacold]

Then I guess normally people are more interested in having people in their bedrooms.

[socialactivillain]

Some people.

[catchacold]

Yeah.

[This conversation is starting to feel circular. This is why he doesn't do small talk.]