maskormenacelogs

Ken doesn't really have to give Maya that expression, if he hasn't guessed yet. She's got a soft spot for kids in general, but kids like Ken are especially refreshing to be around. She appreciates the invitation, anyway; being at home where she can brew in her thoughts just isn't her thing-- at least, not while there are other people around who can see.

"Crepes? Definitely!" she responds cheerily, clasping her hands together. "I haven't had one of those in forever! I'm up for it."

And she is, really; by now Riku's even retrieved some of her clothing for her, so it's not like she has to wander about in borrowed clothing.

He figured she could use some fresh air. As lively as this house could be, with Tetsuo's disappearance and the incidents leading up to it, even Nonah number 5 is tenser than usual. He smiles at her and nods, stepping back to give her space then.

"That's what I was hoping for. Let's go, then. Do you need time to get ready?"

"Nah, I'm good if you are!" she chimes, looking around for her communicator-- ah, yes, not far. She leans over to pick it up.

"Let me just run upstairs to get my bag, aaaaand let's get out of here." As Maya says this, she backs up toward the stairs before spinning on her heel to go retrieve it.

Ken nods again, and he'll wait where she leaves him, hands in his pockets and rocking back and forth on his heels. Koromaru is spending the day with Kaneda and Capsule so it'll just be the two of them, trusting Ken to be able to take care of himself and the girl should the need rise. When she gets back downstairs he'll politely open the front door for her and start leading the way.

It doesn't take Maya long to retrieve her things, and once they're set off, Maya seems pretty eager. It's nice to be out of the house, really-- as much as she appreciates having a place to stay, staying inside so long gives her too much time to think about things. She likes it a bit better this way.

"So, you ever been to this place before or is it something new?"

"I've gone a few times. Usually Koromaru comes with me, when we go out early for a run and decide to get breakfast outside."

For a while that was pretty frequent. They'd get up at the crack of dawn and go out running, sometimes coming back before Kaneda even woke up. It was the alone time outside Ken allowed himself every day.

"I thought you might need a change of pace."

Maya raises her brows, giving Ken a surprised little look, before she starts giggling.

"That obvious?" She asks, trying to make light of it. "Then again, staying with you guys is kind of a change."

"I can't tell from looking," he responds. He's observant, but he's not as verbal in people's unspoken cues as Minato is. Not with people he hasn't watched for a long time. "But you came here suddenly, and I saw your video. Even if you sat around you'll probably think about things you don't want to think about, right?"

It's winter. Even if it's warm still in Heropa, Nonah can get a bit chilly, and Ken pulls the hood of his coat up around his neck.

"... People are usually like that. I go out a lot, too."

Maya's especially glad for Riku's delivery in this weather, honestly. It's not too cold, but without the proper sweaters, she'd likely be distracted by the chill.

"Oh-- you saw it, huh?" she asks, a bit sheepish, as though she's been caught. "You're right. That's why I like to stay busy! I can't sit around and mope when there's work to be done."

We wouldn't want people to think the master's daughter was lazy, now, would we, Mystic Maya?

She shakes the thought off with a shake of her head, exhaling with at 'pbbbt' of her lips.

"Mmm, but."

Ken doesn't look over at her. Hands back in his pocket, he's got his eyes on their surroundings. The gray-white sky, the bare trees, the street signs, the remaining holiday neons in store windows and on the houses. It's not a gesture of coldness, but an action taken not to be too invasive and to give her space.

"But it's important to look at your feelings and sort through them, too. We like it when you smile, but not if you're doing it to hide that you're hurting."

It's then that he finally looks at her. As intense a child as he could be when he wants to be, Ken's eyes are almost as calm and steady as the movements of a clockwork machine.

"What happened?"

Maya's smile fades, her jaw slacking just slightly, as she eyes Ken.

This kid is smart. This is why he brought her out in the first place, isn't it? He's bright-- reminds her of Luke in a way, honestly. Her shoulders relax, and she smiles at the ground for a few paces.

Alright, Ken. You've got her.

"I got in an argument with Edgeworth," she answers, finally, "Aaand it kinda... got personal."

Ken's asked, and has been asked, a lot of straightforward invasive questions. He meets her stare with the same steady gaze, watches her posture change, catches her smile.

And snorts at the comment about Edgeworth.

"I always had a feeling he did that. I'm not surprised."

But rather than letting it end as a joke, he shakes his head and nudges her toward a nearby bench. "About things back home?"

"Yeah," Maya replies, taking his lead and heading toward the bench to sit down. "I mean-- it was kind of my fault."

She sighs, tugging at one of the little hairloops she's got tied up with ribbons today. "I didn't know he used to work against my sister, so, I brought her up. And.... things just went downhill from there."

Hopefully the bench isn't too cold for their poor butts. He lets her talk, sitting down next to her, playing with a piece of lint found in his pocket.

"... He has a lot of strong feelings, especially about wanting what he does, and what he believes in, to be right. But sometimes when he does that, he does it by saying the other side is wrong, and denying their legitimacy.

"Something like that?"

Maya pauses for a minute, bites her lip, looks around as if trying to find the right words. She breathes out, finally, and answers, "Sort of."

Turning her head to look at Ken, she gives him an imploring look-- wide eyes and concerned brows.

"If I tell you something about-- Edgeworth and me, and our families, and what Edgeworth said... Will you promise not to tell Bull and Kaneda?"

"Of course."

Ken figured that if Bull and Kaneda didn't already know, it wasn't because Maya forgot to. Nonah 5 didn't ask many questions, but they were a bunch of strangely loyal assholes that got angry on people's behalf a lot. Ken knew that well. He smiles at her.

"I won't tell anybody anything. I promise."

Ken's smile is good enough for her. Perhaps Maya's a bit too trusting, but she's also good at seeing into other people's hearts-- and she can tell that Ken is trustworthy.

"Thanks."

Giving him a little smile back, she breathes out a sigh again and adjusts on the bench, staring forward as she begins to tell her story.

"It's kind of a lot, but... It's not gonna make sense if you don't know why Edgeworth talks the way he does, y'know? I get it, but it... still kinda hurts.

"17 years ago-- for us-- Edgeworth's dad, defense attorney Gregory Edgeworth... was killed in an elevator while Edgeworth was with him. And they didn't know who did it-- they had no leads.

So they turned to my mother."

Though she doesn't turn her head, Maya can't help but eye Ken as she tells this next part. There's always someone suspicious about this kind of thing, after all.

"I come from a family of spirit mediums, and my mother channelled Mr. Edgeworth to testify in court."

There is a shift in Ken's expression, but it's not as she explains her family's background. It's also not one of incredulity. No, what Ken's expression reacts to is her retelling of Edgeworth's story, as a frown rises to his face and he looks almost pained for a moment, hand reaching up to gently curl in the front of his shirt as he listens.

Spirit mediums. Ken's not surprised by the word, even if he doesn't immediately understand what it means. Spiritually and magic in worlds, even ones that might be otherwise 'normal', were familiar to him. He was the abnormality in his own world, after all. It doesn't even occur to him to question her.

Instead, he pushes back the momentary empathy that rises for young Edgeworth's pain -- he understood that feeling very well -- and asks to let her continue, "Did it work?"

"Of course it worked." She doesn't mean to sound defensive-- and in truth, defensive isn't even really how she sounds. Guarded is closer, and it certainly isn't because of Ken's questioning.

"But Mr. Edgeworth didn't know who really killed him, so the wrong person was put away for his crime, and... And my mom was put out as a fraud. She didn't come home after that."

She looks at the ground, not even noticing that she's gripping the edge of the bench so tight her knuckles are turning white.

"And Edgeworth didn't just think my mother was a fraud. He blamed himself, too."

Ken notices, and as she speaks, he gets to his feet. He reaches over to peel her hands off the bench before she hurts herself, standing in front of her with his hands around hers.

"You said your sister fought against him. Was she a lawyer, too, then?"

Maya stops still for a moment-- because not even she noticed. She hadn't noticed how her breathing had become uneven, or how tense her shoulders had gotten.

But Ken had, and there he was, standing like a little anchor in front of her.

"...Yeah. Mia was a defense attorney," she tells him, looking straight at him, his kindness giving her the strength to speak. "She was the best defense attorney there was. But... I guess when she got started, she had a bad run-in with Edgeworth. I never knew."

She swallows before she speaks again, trying not to sound like she's panicking-- trying not to sound like she's trying to find an excuse for why she brought things up. She's doing a good job of it, and of keeping those panicking feelings at bay, but she can feel them knocking on the back door of her mind.

"I thought, maybe what Mia knew could help Edgeworth's research," she explains, adverting her gaze again, "But he got mad. He said-- he said that she and my mom were frauds and-- and that I was just like them."

Maya doesn't exactly say what Mia knew about, but Ken's intuitive enough to fill in the gaps. A woman from a family of mediums who became a lawyer after a legal problem lost them their mother. He could make the guess easily, and he listens quietly, holding her hands still. He meets her gaze and holds it, and he doesn't say anything to rush or urge her. Whatever she has to say, he'll listen, and wherever she wants to stop is where she can stop.

But as calm as he tries to be, Ken's always felt emotions painfully sharply, and right now, he aches as he watches her. Watches and tries not to get swept by his own emotions again. No matter how proudly he tried to march away from it, no matter how straightforwardly he tried to face it, moving forward doesn't happen easily: he can still see the moment the rubble fell down on his mother, the way the bullets tore into Shinjiro, the way that policeman laughed, and the way Takaya scoffed. He remembers the zap of electricity he felt when he swore, nine years old and freshly alone in the world, that if nobody would help him, he'd find justice for his mother himself. He remembers how hard it was not to crumble from how lonely he'd been.

His grip on Maya's hands tighten, when she looks away, and with only a moment's hesitation, he tugs on them, pulling her close and putting his arms gently around her shoulders.

"I'm not good at this," he starts off saying. "I mean, I understand How Mr Edgeworth must have felt really well. Being hurt like that, being angry like that. Not being able to believe in anything, and not even yourself. I talked to him a lot and I can see that he's always done things alone. It's hard to accept help after that."

It's probably not Maya wants to hear. Perhaps someone else would've just tried to comfort her. Screw him, they might have said. He's just an asshole. But that isn't Ken. And it isn't Ken to take just one side, either, so he continues,

"But that doesn't mean he's right. You just wanted to help him, and even if he's hurt and angry, he said things to hurt you, too. There's no justifying that. He was wrong."

Maya''s not sure at first what to make of his hug, though it doesn't take long for her to accept it and listen to him.

And it's not exactly as though that isn't what she wants to hear. No, that'd require her knowing what she wants to hear. But then he continues, and Maya can't help herself from defending Edgeworth.

Not even now. Not even to Ken.

"He didn't know," she manages, taking in a shaky breath. "He was just-- he was stressed out. I knew that! I shouldn't have said anything.

He didn't-- They're still alive for him. He didn't know."

The end of her defense is even shakier than the beginning, though it's quiet. She's not trying to make a scene-- and even beyond that, she's not sure she could make her voice any louder right now.

Well, at least she isn't pulling away. It's good that they're this close; otherwise, he would've missed her words. But as quiet as Maya is, Ken speaks gently but more loudly than her hushed whisper.

Edgeworth is certainly stressed. Even he can tell. The most relaxed he ever sees him is when he's eating and he's got Koromaru in his lap. But if Miles Edgeworth is allowed to be stressed, then Maya Fey has every reason to be distressed right now. One person's pain doesn't cancel out another person's; nothing in this world is black and white, and nothing in life is certain -- that was the one certainty that Ken can hold in life, and right now, he holds onto that and the words of everyone who taught him so along with the girl in his arms. Softly, he moves one hand to the back of her head, mimicking motions he remembered from his mother and Jaime and Minato and everyone else.

"Them being alive for him makes it okay for him to insult you and your family?"

Maya's brow furrows and her lip quivers just a moment, and she swallows back the lump in her throat, shaking her head slowly.

It's the best answer she can give him at first, but as she listens Ken and really, really takes what he says to hear, she finds more words make it from her head to her lips.

"I-- I didn't even get to know her," she mutters, not quite bitterly, but certainly in pain. "I don't even know what she was like, but Edgeworth talks like that case is... All that she was.

All that I am."

And... and she isn't, right?

But the thought that she might be pushes at the back of her mind. Because she wouldn't be the heiress if not for that case, would she? If Misty had stayed to train both of her daughters?

If that case had never happened, would she be anything worth fighting for? Or anything worth trying to kill?

"And that's where he's wrong. There isn't a single person, Maya-san, who's defined by just one thing."

Ken's voice has been calm this whole time, and that's still the same now, but maybe Maya will hear an awful sadness behind it. He's glad he's holding her now; he doesn't have the confidence to face her right now without it showing on his face. The sadness and the ever-present regret that wells up in his chest, every time he thinks about the people who were lost because of him.

He takes a breath and holds her just a little closer, and if his voice sounds a little shakier, he hopes she ignores it.

"Even if that incident influenced both of you a lot, that isn't all you are. Even if he talks that way, Maya-san -- I think the Maya-san that helped Kaneda-san when I asked her to help is more you than anything else could ever be."

Maya doesn't respond immediately. She nods slowly, though, and hugs him just a little tighter.
He's right, isn't he? She'd never thought that Edgeworth was the things he'd said to her and Nick the first few cases, or that Godot was nothing more than her mother's murderer. They weren't defined by those singular events.

After a moment her shoulders shake once or twice with the quietest laughter.

"Who made you so smart?" she asks, a little more confidently than before, smiling despite the lack of light in her eyes. It's a somber sort of smile, but a smile nonetheless.

"I guess I should have talked to you first."

He reminds her very much of Pearl-- in how intelligent he is, in how determined he can be. But there's so many parts of him that are just so very much his own, that she can't see Pearl in, and she doesn't mind that at all. No, right now she can see clearly that everything that makes him Ken makes him just as important, just as much of a treasure. All of those things that happened in his life, those things that are mysteries to her right now, good or bad-- all of them have made him this bright, amazing kid.

Maybe sometime she'll give herself the same credit.

"I had a lot of help."

So many of whom are here. Temporary, just like anybody in his life, even the people in Iwatodai. The Akihiko and Koromaru he knows here are not the ones back home. Minato and Shinjiro are no longer home. He will one day lose Kaneda, and Bull, and Jaime and Dipper and he'll no longer have this moment with Maya once either of them disappear. He smiles, too, but it's only a smile he gained after accepting that loss is inevitable, so the moments he does have are even more precious.

"And you will too. It's why you came to Kaneda-san, right?"

Kaneda had that power. He gave off energy like no other, and he gave people strength when they needed it. It's why Ken had attached to him so quickly. He laughs a little, thinking about it. Kaneda's such a delinquent, he would never have spoken to him if they met in Iwatodai.

"Do you think you could talk to Mr Edgeworth again?"

"Is that what he told you?" Maya asks, not quite intending to avoid the question about Edgeworth, but seeming slightly incredulous.

She laughs, a bit more sincere about it now. "Kaneda came and found me. Don't let him make you think he's not a big softie."

But after a moment (as she's had a moment to think, by now) she passes a hand through her hair and nods.

"I think... in a little while, I'll talk to him again."

But not right now, not when she could be focusing on Ken and Kaneda and Bull.

"Him? Fool me? He wishes."

Kaneda knows better than to even try anymore. Not that it stops them from bantering. He doesn't say anything about it, but he rests his chin on her shoulder for a moment and smiles to himself. Even if Kaneda did come to pick her up, Kaneda would have given her the choice of coming with him or not, he likes to think. Kaneda was complicated but also sometimes very simple.

After a few seconds, he lets himself pull away and smiles at her, a carefully created but firmly genuine expression.

"We have enough space, so you can stay with us as long as you need, Maya-san. I... um."

Then he looks down, looking a little sheepish as he fully steps away and raises a hand to his head, rubbing the back of his neck and pulling some of his hair into his face. He can totally hide behind it, right?

"It's hard, isn't it? When people call you a liar because of powers they don't understand? I kind of understand. So if you need to talk about it to anyone..."

Maya watches Ken's face with curiosity, raising a brow when he starts to act sheepish. Ken's an enigma; truthfully, she has no idea how old this kid is. Sometimes he speaks with the grace of an aged soul, and then he does adorable things like this.

"You know how it is, huh?" she asks, tilting her head and wiping at her face-- she hasn't quite cried, but she still feels like a mess anyway. "It's... kinda common where I'm from. I don't usually get so mad about it..."

...But Edgeworth tends to go hard, okay.

"Mm, yeah."

He can only imagine how sharp Edgeworth's tongue had gotten. He's had a few debates with him that got heated -- or, in some cases, icy -- and knew that the man had a way of stabbing into you. With something as personal as this, it must have hurt like no other.

"I have powers that nobody in my world knows about. It's just me, and the people involved... usually it's okay, but sometimes it's hard." He shakes his head, steps back, and pushes the smile up higher on his face as he holds out his hand.

"Let's go. They get crowded if we get too late."

"Oh-- sure!"

Taking Ken's hand, Maya gets to her feet and dusts off her lap, nodding. Before they set back off, though, she adds, "You know, that whole talking thing? It goes both ways.

I'm here to listen if you ever need it, too."

He doesn't immediately pull his hand away, though she's free to let go if she wants to. He links, surprised by her offer despite what he told her, then looks away with an embarrassed expression.

"I'm..." he starts, then bites his lip.

"Yeah. Um -- it's long past for me. But I guess that doesn't mean you move past it. It's embarrassing. Even though I wanted to support you, I keep thinking about myself, too."

"...Why's that embarrassing?" Maya asks, raising a brow. "Isn't it better for you to say stuff like that if you know how it feels?"

She doesn't let go of his hand either, looking at him with that questioning tilt of her head.

"I mean, y'know. Empathy and all that. Even if you're thinking about yourself, that doesn't mean you weren't thinking of me too, right?"

"Ah., yeah."

He nods, but he still turns his head to look ahead of them as they walk, cheeks flushing. What she's saying makes sense, but he's still cautious, knowing that he's grown into the habit of being listened to. He doesn't want to take the attention away from her, because he knows that given the opportunity, someone like her would want to help him more than be helped, too.

"Um... It's stuff like this, you know? You're a really kind person, Maya-san. The things you do, like this, say more about who you are than anything someone else might tell you."

"You think so?"

Maya's quick to dismiss it. How she acts-- it's not any different or better than how anyone else does, right? But Ken's right; it's practically instinctive how tempted she is to turn the attention back to Ken.

"...Thanks. I guess I just... I was more mad about my sister and my mom than about myself, really.."

There. With that admission, at least she isn't changing the subject entirely.

That sounds like something Maya Fey would do, but Ken doesn't say that. He doesn't know her that well, and even if he did, it's not necessary to say it out loud and point it out to her. She knows. Most people know what their own typical behaviors are.

Ken glances at her, then glances away back down the street. He can see the place just a couple blocks away. Soon, they'll have to end this conversation.

"I think that's fine," he responds. "It's harder to get mad for yourself, and you care about your family a lot, right?"

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